Three Bell Chime

My New Career...Professional Fort Builder

2011-02-09T11:08:00.000-08:00

I can easily remember asking my mother and father to build my sister and I a fort when we were younger. They would take blankets and drape them over the dining room chairs and we would huddle inside our fort and would magically be transported to an imaginary land. Nothing existed outside of the fort. Along with us, we would bring our favorite toys and blankies and hunker down in the fort for as long as we could, which was usually until dinner or bed time. Soon, we began to build our own forts. We made new designs and would use as much furniture as we could to make it larger and more grandiose.

Fast forward 20 years. (Yes, I still enjoyed forts at 13!) Clark's new favorite thing to do is to have anyone make a fort for him. Thanks to Uncle Chris, who introduced him to a fort, Clark constantly is asking for us to make him a fort (which sounds more like "fork" when he says it). Now there isn't a day that goes by without a fort being made in the house, and the best thing about that is that I get to play in them as well.

Clark and I in the small fort.

Clark in the super couch fort.

A Quest for Perfection

2011-02-01T14:10:00.001-08:00

One of the many reasons why this blog has had a lack in posts is due to the fact that I have enrolled in a Masters program. Pretty much all of my free time now goes towards Clark, Alli, school, or my new schooling. Having jumped back into the grinder of graduate level classes, I made a decision that I would try to achieve greatness while taking my classes. That greatness being a result of straight As in all of my classes. I have never been a straight A student. The only time I ever got straight As was in my final semester of college, which was mostly puff classes, and I wanted to see if it could be done.

As I wrap up my latest class and approach the mid way point, I have hit a new record. This class will make it 6 in a row! Booyah, old self! 4.o here I come!

Has it been that long?

2010-10-09T10:32:00.001-07:00

Man, I guess the summer really got the best of me. Sorry for not keeping up with the posting, but I thought I should get back into it. Teaching, taking Masters courses, and being a family man takes a lot out of a guy. So...since I've been gone for a while, I'll catch you up quickly. School is going well. The new class is good, but filled with some characters. I just finished my fourth course in my Master's program. I'm holding steady with a 4.0. Alli is doing well at OHSU and Clark is turning into quite a little man. His vocabulary is growing like crazy. He's a little sponge that sucks up everything around him. He has started at a new day care and is having a blast. Music wise, I've been working with some friends at the church to record guitar and bass parts for some original music to share with the church. (Don't worry...I'll post it when it's done.) Lastly, our house is finally to the point of being close to completion (with home improvements). All that's left is to paint.

Once again, sorry to have neglected the blog for so long. Just to make it up to you, here is a cute picture of Clark in his fireman hat that he got from the fire fighters who talked at his day care.

Breaking News!

2010-05-19T21:28:00.000-07:00

My wife is the bomb. After seeing my post, she replies, "Mal is the Han Solo that shoots first." Man, I love that woman!

Castle SPOILER!!!

2010-05-19T19:58:00.000-07:00

I'm so glad Kate picked Mal instead of Anders! Mal Reynolds is the man. And Anders is a Cylon anyways, so doesn't that automatically count him out?

But I look really good in a flight suit! Kate has to pick me!

But I got a cool gun, I'm captain of my own ship, and I look really dashing and have Han Solo- like charm. I win.

Vanity Fair = UPS

2010-05-17T16:18:00.000-07:00

For those that haven't seen the latest cover of Vanity Fair, prepare yourself. First, it's nice to see that Vanity Fair has taken an interest in soccer. With the World Cup right around the corner (Only 23 days till it begins!), every one is writing stories and editorials on the players and places. Enter Vanity Fair. Hot on the heals of Drogba being on Time's 100 Most Influential People in the World list, Vanity Fair chose to feature Drogba and Ronaldo on their front cover. It's great that the world is doing it's best to let us all know about the stars that will take center stage at the World Cup, but why to portray two of the best players in a total beefcake pose on the front cover is ridiculous. We already know that footy players have nice bodies, but to grease them up like Chip and Dale dancers and have them stand so close to each other that their pelvises are nearly touching is just gross. And it's not like these two need any other excuse to increase the size of their already ultra-inflated egos. Sure...Ladies will drool, but Vanity Fair might as well change their name to UPS because it seems they are trying to deliver Drogba's and Ronaldo's packages to the news stand of America.

To see the pic, click here.

We got bombed on!

2010-04-18T22:20:00.000-07:00

Many people lately have been getting into the art of photo bombing. Photo bombing is when someone is taking a picture and you jump in in the background and make the most ridiculous face ever. Some friends and I at work even try to bomb on each other whenever pictures are taken. And finally...it happened me. My friend Sean was taking a picture of us. He snaps the photo and says, "That's the one. It's a keeper." In my excitement, I asked for the camera to see the perfect family photo and this is what I saw.

Thanks Clint. Just wait. You'll get yours!

Tenfold

2010-04-12T13:14:00.000-07:00

It's funny how God can use situations to teach you lessons.

Rewind about 13 years ago. I was in my first band... a hardcore band we called Tenfold. We wanted to focus in on the fact that whatever you do, if done for Christ, he could take it and multiply it tenfold. We always dreamed of playing the huge venues and to thousands of fans that would be there to see us. Largest crowd we ever played for... a little over 100 people.

5 years later, in Serus Victoria, I dreamt of the same thing. Huge crowds. Large venues. 2 CDs and many shows later, the band ended when I left for Oregon. Largest crowd we ever played for...about 500.

Today, I am currently not in a band. I make music with my friend Travis at the church, but we do it for fun. I also play at Sunset on the worship team. I may not be writing a ton of music, but I play on a regular basis. In all honesty, I've lost the desire to NEED to make a name for myself in the music industry and am very content and happy that I am using my musical gifts for God's glory.

Flash forward to yesterday. Alli and I were sitting in our church service and she leaned over to show me something in the bulletin. I looked down to see what she was pointing at and, in awe, saw the total number of people who attended the Easter services (which I happened to play for). Total number...5,500. I couldn't believe it. Never in my entire life could I have ever imagined playing music for over 5,000 people.

I guess the name Tenfold was very appropriate if you think of it in comparison to SV's largest gig. All in all, it's good to be in God's plan using my gifts for His glory.

The Perfect Storm

2010-03-09T19:52:00.000-08:00

So...I've been saving up sick days for when Clark would get sick and I would have to stay home with him. But today was a doozie. All three of us were sick today and me with the worst of it all. I used to laugh about how people with small children just pass it all around in a vicious cycle. It's completely true! On top of that, Oregon has chosen to act completely crazy and snow in late March. We all sat in the window the other night and were shocked to see it hail so much the ground was white. And all this after the most gorgeous weekend that got up to the 60 degree mark. I guess all of the planets have aligned and we all got the short end of the stick. Here's to hoping for warmer days, minus the sickness.

"That scared the hell out of me!"

2010-01-19T14:07:00.000-08:00

"That scared the hell out of me!" a student said as I walked by him and his friend in the hallway at school. My first response was to correct the student to not say "hell" while he was at school, but the more I thought about this phrase, my brain kept taking me back to a special moment in my past.

When I was about 5 years old, we were living in the small town of Reedley, California. Dad was working as a youth pastor at the big Reedley MB church, and every Sunday we would go to church and listen to the pastor preach. In my 5 year old mind, the man was amazing. He knew everything in the Bible and never stopped talking about it. He would talk about the life of Jesus and the Ten Commandments. He also preached about things like heaven and hell. I didn't mind hearing about the heaven stuff, but hated listening to sermons where the topic was hell.

Anyways, the preacher must have been preaching something fierce about hell and suffering and being apart from God one night at church, and I started getting really scared. The whole drive home I sat in the back seat, my brain churning with terrible thoughts of the devil, with his pointy three-pronged pitch fork, waving at me from his fiery pit of damnation. It was "scaring the hell out of me", so much that when my mother was tucking me into bed I quickly blurted out, "What do you do if you don't want to go to hell?" My mom smiled, and right there told me about asking Jesus into my heart. It all made sense to me. Jesus = no hell. So that night, I accepted Jesus into my heart.

Don't get me wrong. I'm not saying that the best way to get people to come to Jesus is to scare them into a relationship with Christ, but I for one am glad the preacher used a little fire and brimstone talk to grease my wheels. It's just good to know I had "the hell scared out of me" on that late Sunday night in Reedley, California.

My Favorite Gift

2010-01-08T13:42:00.000-08:00

It's no secret. I love Kung-Fu movies. Even more that that, I love Jackie Chan movies. Sure, getting movies for Christmas is fun, but you can only watch them so many times. But when someone gives you something that is completely unexpected, yet still relates to one of the things you love...those are the gifts to cherish. So imagine the look on my face when I unwrapped this.

Yep. That's right. It's Jackie Chan. A 12 inch movable doll that is one sixth the size of Jackie Chan himself (which really doesn't make sense considering he isn't 6 ft tall). He came with detachable sunglasses and jacket and can be molded into any position that you can think of. He now resides on the top of my desk, eagerly waiting to open a can of kung-fu hurt on any 4th grader who wants to pop some attitude. Watch out 4th grade! Here comes Jackie Chan!

Thanks, Mark!

In 2009, I...

2010-01-02T17:34:00.000-08:00

Became a father,

Taught 4th grade for the third year in a row (my 9th year of teaching),

Got a new brother-in-law,

Wrote three songs, some blog posts, and my first (official) short story,

Enjoyed watching TV shows, including Burn Notice, Angel, Leverage, Castle, and the 9th season of Smallville,

Continued loving my wife for the 9th year in a row (6 years married),

Read The Lightening Thief, The Magicians Elephant, the ultimate guides to Superman and Conan, and more trade paperbacks than I can count (thank you, library!),

Rocked out on my guitar at Sunset Presbyterian Church,

and became an official dork by visiting the SciFi Museum in Seattle.

When I grow up, I want to be a...

2009-12-14T10:11:00.000-08:00

As Clark grows older, it's strange to think that some day this little nugget of a dude will grow up and have a job in some sort of field. As he grows older, he has even started to show signs of strengths and interests in things around the house. He loves watching lights, has tons of energy, and has even started bouncing to the beat when he listens to music. So I think to myself, maybe he'll be a musician, play sports or even become an electrician.

Then one day I noticed another habit that he had. He loves to play with the tags on toys. That's fine with me, except the fact that all of the tags happen to be on the rear ends of all of his stuffed animals. So the other day I was sitting with him, and as usual he began playing with the tag on one of his favorite stuffed animals. I couldn't help but think, as Clark looked up at me to take this picture, either he wants to be a veterinarian when he grows up...or a proctologist.

Christmas Dumpster Diving

2009-12-07T14:45:00.001-08:00

Now that it's legally Christmas time (December) and I can now listen to Christmas music and pull out the old decorations and decorate the tree, I have been thinking a lot about the things we all do for Christmas. It always seems every year is different. Last year was the first year Alli and I cut a live tree. This year, I portrayed Joseph in the children's Christmas play at our church. The list could go on and on, but the more I think of it, the more one memory always comes to mind. That memory is of the year my father and I dumpster dove on a cold Christmas Eve night.

We had already pulled all of the decorations out of the boxes that we hid every year in the garage and did as much as we could to turn our home in Visalia, California, into a winter wonderland. We put the wreath on the door, hung the countdown calendar on the fridge, and set up the nativity scene in the front room. It was all perfect all except for one thing. We didn't have a tree.

It was no secret that year. We didn't have a lot of money. Dad had told us money was a little tight and that we would get a tree....eventually. We just didn't know when "eventually" was. Did that mean in a few days, or did he mean in a couple of weeks? We waited all month for the moment dad would tell us that we were going to hop in the car and go to the Christmas tree lot to get a tree, but the days passed and we continued to wait. We waited all month. It wasn't until Christmas Eve night that dad told me that we were going to go and get a tree.

"You got some extra money?" I asked.

"Not quite," my father replied. "But we'll be able to get a tree."

How in the world were we going to get a tree without money? I wanted to ask my dad, but I knew he had a plan. He had never let me down before, so why should I think any less of him now? We were going to get a tree. I just didn't have a clue how we were going to do it.

After dinner, we jumped into the car, just he and I, and we started driving. The city was a ghost town. Everyone was inside, snuggling up under the covers, waiting for Christmas day to arrive.

"There's got to be one around here somewhere," my father said as he drove. "We just have to find one." He was a man on a mission, searching the parking lots we passed by like an eagle searches for it's prey. We kept on driving until he finally saw what he was looking for.

We pulled into the parking lot to one of our favorite places to eat. Mearl's Drive-In. The place was ancient. It had been around when my father was in high school and was still up an running, still making their artery clogging burgers, fries, and gigantic ice cream sundays. Although the diner was closed, the huge neon light still buzzed on through the night. "Eat at Mearl's," the sign flashed to me as I looked out the car window.

"This will work," my dad said as he stopped the car. "We can get our tree here."

"Here?" I asked. "There's nothing here. The Christmas tree lot that was here already closed down. How are we supposed to get a tree now?"

We walked all the way to the back of the parking lot and stopped next to the dumpster. He turned and motioned for me to come over to where he was.

My father finally stopped to clue me in on the plan.

"Every year, Christmas tree lots everywhere end up having extra trees that they can't sell. It's usually the scrawny ones or the ones with problems that they can't get rid of. So, they just throw them away on Christmas Eve when they close the lot for the season." He pointed to the dumpster. "Somewhere in this dumpster has got to be a tree that's good enough to put in our house...and you're going to find it."

I pointed to myself. "Me?"

"Yep."

"So you mean I'm going to jump out that dumpster and pick a Christmas tree?"

"Yep."

A smile spread across my face. It was like a game. Find the best Christmas tree in the dumpster.

Seconds later, I was in the dumpster. My dad climbed right in after me. The dumpster was full to the brim with all different sizes of trees. Tiny ones. Scrawny ones. Dead ones. And tons more. We began moving trees to see what we could find. We kept digging. It seemed like all the bad ones were on the top, but we were determined to find something special in that heap of unfortunate trees. Finally, as we neared the bottom of the dumpster, we found it.

We picked it up and threw it out of the dumpster. It was huge. And tall. It would have been a perfect specimen of a tree, had it not had a huge hole towards the base of it's body.

I stared at the hole in the side of the tree. "What are we going to do about that?" I asked, pointing to the hole.

"We'll hide it in the back. That way no one will see it." My dad smiled at me. "When we're done with it, you won't even know it's there.

And with that, we picked up the tree, tied it to our car, and took it home. A couple of hours later, the tree was decorated. We all stood and stared at the tree in satisfaction. It was big, beautiful, and best of all, it was free. You couldn't even tell that it had been pulled out of a dumpster.

To this day, I still sit and think about past Christmas trees. I try to remember some of the other trees that we decorated as a family. Which was the biggest? The best? I try to picture them in my head, but I can't remember any of them. The only tree that I can remember, and the best tree I ever had, was the tree my father and I rescued on Christmas Eve...the dumpster tree.

Not to brag, but...

2009-12-04T15:46:00.000-08:00

When November came to an end, NaNoWriMo wrapped up last week as well. At the beginning of the month I had set a goal of writing 7,500 words over the entire month. That meant having to write at least 419 words a day for 18 days. It was difficult to push myself to write during class time with the students because you always have something that needs to be graded or done, but I buckled down and actually did it every day. Now that it's over, I'm actually amazed at how much I have written...which is over 8,000 words! Not only did the kids enjoy listening to my story as it grew day by day (which motivated them, too), but I also really had fun. Just taking 30 minutes a day to express myself creatively through writing was actually very therapeutic and rejuvenating. I highly recommend it. Who knows, maybe I'll write 10,000 words next year.

Alligator Wrestler: Part 6 - The End

2009-12-03T09:51:00.000-08:00

Mrs. Anderson quickly disappeared into the house and then appeared with my towel in her hands. She motioned for me to meet her in the shallow end.

"Just act cool," I told myself and began to swim towards the shallow end.

One by one, the girls started glancing at me as I waded towards the steps. I had crossed the line into enemy territory and the enemy knew I was there. I quickly worked my way to the steps and sat down.

"I just need to rest for a little while," I said out loud for anyone who was in ear shot. The girls looked over at me for a second, but then went back to their chattering and giggling.

"Alright. Quickly. Let's go," Mrs. Anderson said, just loud enough for me to hear.

It was the moment of truth. Now or never. I quickly jumped up, one hand covering my front, the other covering my rear, and ran into the outstretched towel. Mrs. Anderson quickly wrapped me up tight, like a burrito.

I slowly turned to see if anyone had seen. To my surprise and great relief, no one had noticed. They all just continued to play, unaware that I had just experienced the most embarrassing moment in my life.

Mrs. Anderson led me to the hall bathroom. "I already put a pair of Billy's old swim trunks in there for you to change into," she said. "Just holler if you need anything else.

I walked into the bathroom, locked the door behind me and began to look for the pair of trunks. There, on the counter next to the sink, was the swimsuit.

"What are the chances?" I thought to myself.

There in front of me was Billy's old swimsuit. It was like a mirrored copy of the torn suit that was barely hanging onto my waist, only it was the color blue. They even had the same red stripe that went down the legs and around the bottom of the leg holes. I removed the tattered suit from my body and put on Billy's old suit. They were just as tight as my old pair.

"Here we go again," I said as I looked at myself in the mirror. I grabbed my towel and headed back outside to the pool. Maybe there was still time for me to get back into the game. But as I made my way outside, the scene I saw was completely different than when I left it.

There, in the middle of the pool, floating by himself on the alligator, was Billy. All the other boys were strewn about the pool. Some hung onto the side of the pool, while others lay on the walkway exhausted. It was like a battle field and only one final soldier was left floating atop the alligator.

Billy yelled triumphantly. "I'm the best Alligator Wrestler in the world!"

I stood there, now in Billy's old swim suit, debating whether I should go and challenge the now reigning king of the alligator.

Billy spotted me standing by the side of the pool. "You wanna take on the champ?" he yelled.

I still had the energy to do it. While I had been changing, he had been wasting all his energy becoming the top wrestler. I knew I could do it, but I also knew how flimsy old swim trunks held up against the most physical pool game I had ever played in my life.

"Nah," I replied. "I think I'll just swim instead of playing Alligator Wrestler."

Billy smiled. He was the champ…the king…the top Alligator Wrestler. "Woo hoo!" he cried. "I win!"

Even though I knew I could have probably beat him, I was still satisfied with the way things turned out. Billy, the birthday boy, had won. We were all having a great time. And no one, except Mrs. Anderson and myself, knew about my swimsuit being torn in two. Sure, I wasn't the winner of the game today, but that was the beauty of Alligator Wrestler. It never ended. It would continue to go on, and the next time the game continued, I would be right there in the middle of it all. And most importantly, I would be there, wrestling with all the other boys, playing in my new swimsuit.

Alligator Wrestler: Part 5

2009-12-02T16:39:00.001-08:00

I looked to the steps in the shallow end, but there THEY were. The girls. What moments ago had looked like a small pack of minnows now looked like a teaming pack of piranhas, ready to gobble up anything they came in contact with.

There had to be a way out without completely embarrassing myself. If I went out of the shallow end, all the girls would see and then I wouldn't hear the end of it. I could here it now. The laughing. The ridicule. The nicknames. I wasn't going to get out of the shallow end and risk getting pegged for life with a nick-name like Bare Butt Ben.

The more I thought, the more I realized that someone was going to end up finding out because someone was going to have to help me cover up as I got out of the pool. I looked back to the boys. No. Then to the girls. No way! That left me with only one option…a parent. If my mother had been there, she would have helped out, but that was the problem. She wasn't here. She was off running errands.

My eyes scanned through the parents sitting poolside. They all seemed to be in deep conversations with each other. I continued to scan the crowd until I came across what I thought to be my one and only hope. Mrs. Anderson. She was watching all the kids play in the pool as she sat in her chair near the shallow end.

"Mrs. Anderson!"

She looked over to me as I waved for her to come over to the side of the pool where I was hanging onto the edge.

"Yes, Ben? Do you need something?" she said as she squatted down by the edge of the pool.

"I kind of have a problem," I replied.

"A problem? What problem? You look just fine to me," she said.

"It's my pants."

"Your pants?" she asked.

"My swim trunks." I took a deep breath. It was now or never if I was going to ask for help. "They, uh, kind of, uh, ripped."

"What, like, a small tear?" She put out her index finger and thumb and put them about an inch apart.

"No. Like a tear!" I put out both my hands about three feet apart to get my point across.

"Oh dear. That is a big tear," she said.

"It goes all the way from the front to the back! Please, you gotta help me," I pleaded.

She stopped talking and thought for a moment until she perked up. I could see the light bulb turn on in her head. "Alright, here's the plan. I'll go get your towel and meet you at the steps in the shallow end. You'll get out super fast and I'll wrap the towel around you so that no one will see. Then you can go inside, change into one of Billy's old swimsuits, and it will all be fine. OK?"

"OK…but," I began to say, but it was too late. She had already turned to go inside to get my towel. "But…but…The shallow end?

Not the shallow end! Anywhere but the shallow end. I'd almost risk getting out on the side of the pool and all the boys seeing my bare buns than go to the shallow end!

Alligator Wrestler: Part 4

2009-12-01T16:29:00.000-08:00

The girls made their way back to the shallow end, where they once again began to chatter, giggle and point. The rest of the boys lined up behind me. The game was about to begin again and I was at the front of the line. The alligator floated in the center of the deep end.

"Alright, Ben," said Travis, who was standing behind me in line. "Let round two begin!"

"Yeah, go already!" yelled Billy, who was waiting at the end of the line.

Oh, I was going to go alright. I was going to leap…no…fly on top of that alligator and with one mighty squeeze of my legs, I was going to crush it to pieces in front of all the girls who stared at me from the shallow end.

"Go, Ben, Go!" their eyes screamed to me as I stepped out to the edge of the diving board, took a deep breath and jumped.

But this was no ordinary jump. This was a super jump. The jump of all jumps. The uber-jump. It was one of those jumps that takes you so high, when you hit the apex, time seems to slow to a crawl and stop. And in that frozen moment, I could do no wrong. Nothing mattered. Not my year old swim trunks, my ultra white thighs, or the fact that I was a puny ten year old boy. All that mattered was that I was about to make Alligator Wrestler history.

I landed with a thud. My eyes and ears became filled with all the sights and sounds of the moment. The girls squealed with delight. The boys yelled their manly battle cries. The parents cheered from the side of the pool. But in the mix of all these sights and sounds, I also heard another sound.

Rrrrrrriiiiiiiiiippppppppp!

Now, you might be thinking to yourself, "No big deal. Threads pop and tear, but it couldn't be that bad, right?"

Wrong.

I quickly slipped off the alligator as Travis jumped on behind me and swam to the edge of the pool to assess the damage. My hand shot to my backside to feel the area and see if the tear was bad. I felt nothing. In some cases, feeling nothing would be wonderful, but in this case it meant I felt exactly that…nothing! Where I should have been feeling swimsuit, I felt nothing but the skin on my now exposed and bare butt! It was the mother of all tears.

I continued to feel about, but the more I felt, the more shocked I became. The hole, if you could even call it that, was not just in the back. The sheer force of my super, spectacular, uber-jump had torn my swimsuit in two. The only thing holding the two pieces together was the elastic waist band, which looked as if it too was about to pop.

"Great," I thought to myself. Not only was my butt hanging out the back, but mini-Ben and the boys were dangling out the front as well.

"You still playing?" Billy yelled from the alligator.

"Yeah," I quickly replied. "I'll be back in a second. I'm just taking a breather."

"But we just started back up! Just admit it," he said, "you're not man enough to continue."

Oh, I was man enough all right. If I got out of the pool right there he'd have been able to see how manly I was whether he wanted to or not.

"What am I going to do?" I thought as I continued to tread water by the side of the pool.

Alligator Wrestler: Part 3

2009-11-25T15:46:00.001-08:00

We landed with a thud.

"Woo hoo!" I yelled as I wrestled my way up the alligator.

"Isn't this awesome?" Billy yelled, who was vying for a better position on the alligator. He made it up to the top and we wrestled to see who the master of the alligator would be, but were torn from our place by all the other boys. Travis, who I could now see in the middle of the group, slid up onto the alligator and took over our spot. I began to swim around the alligator, looking for a place that I could grab hold when something else caught my attention.

It was the girls…the minnows in the shallow end. They were still talking like they were before, but they were doing something else I didn't notice before. They were watching the boys. Some stared. Others pointed and giggled with delight.

"They're watching us," I thought to myself. But then a light blinked on in my head. They weren't watching us. They were checking us out!

Suddenly a new thought occurred to me. This wasn't a game anymore. The addition of the admirers of the opposite sex had changed this from a game into a way for young boys to display their strength and power. This was the true alpha-male extravaganza and all the girls had front row seats to the competition. I needed to get back in there! I couldn't let the girls just see Billy and the others in their macho display of strength. They needed to see ME! It now no longer mattered if I had white legs, wore an old swimsuit or was one of the smallest boys at the party. I needed to show the girls that I was the man. The one. The only. Alligator Wrestler!

I quickly grabbed hold of someone's leg and got back up onto the alligator. But as soon as you would get back up on to it, someone would pull you down and the cycle would begin all over again. The war waged on for what seemed like an hour until it was suddenly interrupted.

"Cake and presents time!" yelled Billy's mom.

Everyone got out of the pool and walked over to the patio where Mrs. Anderson stood.

"Can't we keep playing?" I asked.

"After cake and presents," she replied.

Cake was served and we all gathered around Billy, who began unwrapping his gifts that sat next to him in a huge pile. First a transformer. A shirt. Some Legos. Some shorts. And tons more. I couldn't help but sit there, waiting anxiously to get back to the game. Even though the game had no end, I knew the party would, thus creating an end to this round of the game. In my mind, there was only going to be one alligator wrestler left standing (or floating, in our case), and that was going to be me.

As soon as Billy finished unwrapping his final gift, a Voltron robot that he had asked his mother for, we all tried to make our way back to the pool..."tried" being the key word here.

Billy's mom yelled after us. "You guys have to wait 15 minutes before you get back in. If you don't you'll cramp up from all that cake you guys ate."

15 minutes? We wanted to play NOW, but the one thing that you couldn't do was say no to Mrs. Anderson. Even if she may have said everything with a big smile plastered on her face, we all knew she meant business.

We sat back down and proceeded to stare at the clock. 15. 10. 5. 4. 3. 2. 1.

"Finally!" I yelled as I made my way quickly over to the diving board.

Alligator Wrestler: Part 2

2009-11-24T14:47:00.000-08:00

The car slowed to a stop in front of my friend Jimmy's house. My mother leaned over and kissed me on the cheek as I got out of the car.

"Mom! Don't do that. I'm not a baby anymore," I said.

"You'll always be my baby," she said back with a smile. "Have fun. And call me if you need anything."

"Alright," I said. I grabbed the gift for my friend and closed the door. "Love you."

"Love you, too," she yelled out the window as she pulled away.

I watched as she left, gift in one hand and towel and swimsuit in the other. The party had finally arrived and I was ready.

I ran to the door and rang the doorbell. My friend Jimmy's mother answered the door and greeted me with a smile. She was a tall, happy, red haired woman who loved to throw parties and make everyone feel at home.

I handed her the gift. "Here's my gift for Jimmy. I hope he likes it."

"I'm sure he will, Ben," she said. "Jimmy is in the pool with the rest of the boys. You can change in the bathroom down the hall. We'll do gifts and cake after you guys swim for a while."

"Thanks, Mrs. Anderson," I said as I walked to the hall bathroom. I quickly changed into my swimsuit. It was tight…and short! It made me look completely ridiculous. I had already gotten a tan from playing outside, but the tan line only came to the top of my knees. After the tan stopped, there were only my white lets. The too short shorts couldn't cover them up at all. I tried pulling them down to cover up my stark white thighs. That only pulled the top of my suit lower and I wasn't going to go out there with my butt hanging out for everyone to see. There was only one solution. I just had to hike up the suit and go out there…just me, my shorts and my ultra white legs.

"Here we go," I told myself in the mirror.

* * * * *

The party was in full swing when I walked out the screen door to the backyard. Many parents sat on lawn chairs while all the kids were in the pool. It was exciting, but quickly noticed there was something strange was going on in the pool. All of the boys were boisterously playing in the deep end while all of the girls were huddled together in the shallow end of the pool like a school of minnows. I had thought that all of the boys and girls would have been playing together, but instead it was starting to look like an old-fashioned Mennonite gathering.

Billy got out of the pool and excitedly walked (because his mother was watching like a hawk) over to where I stood.

"You got to come play this new game we just made up!" He was obviously excited about the game because he couldn't stop bouncing up and down with excitement.

"What game?" I asked.

"Alligator Wrestler!" He quickly explained the rules to me. The players, which at this point were only boys, jumped one-by-one onto the back of the giant floaty alligator that was in the center of the pool. The goal was to be the one who could stay on the longest.

I nodded my head to let Billy know I understood, but there was only one thing missing. "How do you win?" I asked. Someone had to win, right?

"That's the best part," said Billy. "You can win, but you can't." I was confused. He continued. "When you are on top, you're the winner, but as soon as someone else is on top, they become the winner. That way, the game just keeps going and going and going."

A game that never ended? Every kid, no matter who he or she is, is always on the lookout for that one game that could continually go on forever and never get old. By the look on Billy's face, he and the others had just discovered it.

He grabbed my hand and started pulling me to where the action was taking place. His mother's voice rang out. "No running, Billy!"

Billy slowed to a walk. "Sorry, mom." She smiled back at us.

We quickly walked over to the deep end where all the boys were playing. The girls were still in the shallow end…talking. The deep end, on the other hand, was a war zone. In the center of the pool was the alligator, covered from head to toe with my friends, and they all seemed to be wrestling, flailing and jockeying for position. One boy would fall off, another would jump on. It was an unending cycle of chaos. I already loved it. It was like King of the Hill, only it took place on top of some poor unsuspecting pool toy that, at the moment, looked as if it's plastic googly eyes were about to pop out of it's head.

"Hey, Ben! You got to try this," yelled my friend, Travis. "It's awesome!" I couldn't even see him. He was somewhere in the midst of all those flailing body parts.

Billy looked over at me. "You ready?"

"You know it," I said back with a mischievous grin. "Let's go!"

And with that, we both jumped, flying through the air, and landed on top of the giant mass of boys and blown-up alligator.

Alligator Wrestler: Part 1

2009-11-23T13:31:00.000-08:00

The story below is taken from the memory of my most embarrassing moment in my life thus far. Although some things have been changed for the sake of telling a good story, the majority of it is true. I've also broken it up into sections, so that I don't have to post it in one gigantic post. Hope you enjoy it.

ALLIGATOR WRESTLER

"Mom, where's my swimsuit?" I yelled as I rummaged through the bottom of my dresser. It was the beginning of springtime and I had just been invited to the first swim party of the season. My friend Jimmy was turning 10 and had invited everyone in our 4^th grade class to his party. To say that I was excited would have been an understatement. I was ecstatic!

"It couldn't have gone far," my mom yelled back from the kitchen. "We just bought it last week. Check and see if it's in the beach bag in the hall closet."

I ran to the hall closet and began rifling through the bag. Towels. Lotions. Toys. But no swimsuit. The only thing close to a usable pair of swim trunks were the old pair I wore last year, and they were a size too small.

"They're not here," I yelled back in frustration. "All I found were my old ones."

My mother, who hated having conversations by yelling at each other across the house, came to the hall closet. "I don't know where they could have gone," she said. Why don't you just use your trunks from last year?"

"The old ones?" I replied. "No way! They're too small!"

My mother shrugged her shoulders. "Then I guess you'll just have to go naked."

Naked? No way! I knew she was being sarcastic, but I couldn't go naked! Not only was this the first birthday swim party of the year, but this would also be the first boy/girl party I had ever been to and I was dead set on showing up wearing the proper attire.

"Can't I just wear a pair of shorts and underwear? I asked. I was beginning to get desperate. I would rather have to deal with wearing heavy, droopy drawers than swim in my old swimsuit that was too small.

"No," she replied. I could tell that she was beginning to get frustrated.

"Please?"

"No."

"Come on."

"No."

"Just this once. Pleease."

My mother had had enough. "No! Either wear the old trunks or don't swim at all!"

There it was. The ultimatum. When mom threw down the gauntlet I knew that the conversation was over. I either had to sit on the sidelines at the party and watch everyone have a good time or suck it up and wear my old swim trunks.

"Alright. I'll wear the old trunks."

"Good," my mother said with a satisfied grin on her face. "Don't forget to get a towel and sunscreen as well." She walked back down the hall to the kitchen to continue whatever it was she was doing.

I reached back into the beach bag and pulled out my old swimsuit. They were yellow with a thin red stripe that went down the sides of the suit and around the bottom of the leg holes. They looked like a pair of running shorts. You know, the kind you see someone wearing and think to yourself, "Boy are those some short shorts." Worst of all was the fact that they were beginning to get a little thin and see-through. But it was either wear this pair of trunks or miss out on all the fun, and I wasn't going to miss this party…my first boy/girl party.

NaNoWriMo

2009-11-19T09:37:00.000-08:00

I used to hate writing growing up. I would have much rather been drawing pictures of cartoon characters or fantastical landscapes than express myself through written words. But when I became a teacher and began to teach writing to students, something in me began to change. I began to get excited about things like sentence structure, grammar (which I call G.U.M. time in my class - Grammar Usage and Mechanics), and narrative writing. Since teaching is all about modeling to your students, it became hard for me to not take part in the writing assignments that I was giving out to my students.

For the month of November, my students and I, and thousands of other students around the nation, are taking part in NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month). For the entire month, we choose to use 30 minutes of our day to write in our NaNoWriMo journals. Now to some, this may seem like an easy feat, but you would be surprised at how difficult this can truly be. This year, being my third time taking part in the activity, I decided to truly take advantage of the 30 minutes of writing and push myself to create something. And I did.

Yesterday, I finished my first story in my journal. I never would have thought of writing a short story in my spare time, but now that I have done it I actually really enjoyed it. But being the creative person that I am, I am left wanting something a little more. I feel the need to share. Stories are meaningless if they are not shared, so for the following days on the Three Bell Chime, I am going to share my story with you. I know it may be a bit long, but I hope all of you will enjoy reading it as much as I have enjoyed writing it.

Want to learn more about NaNoWriMo and join the thousands of kids writing this month in the USA, click here.

Thanksgiving Rant

2009-11-17T11:33:00.000-08:00

I try not to be a negative person. I really do, but there are some things in the world that just make me see red. What might make me so agitated that I have to write about it on my blog? you wonder. This. How people are conditioned to skip past Thanksgiving and move right on to Christmas.

For those of you that know me well, Thanksgiving is my favorite time of year. Not only does it happen in the fall (my favorite season), but it also is a holiday that can't be tainted by the commercial garbage that comes along with holidays like the 4th of July, Halloween, and Christmas. It's about giving thanks for the things you have, appreciating everything and everyone, and celebrating that fact with the ones we love. It's an "unselfish" holiday, and I think this is the reason people want to skip past it. They want to get to the "getting" holiday in stead of focus on Thanksgiving, which leads me to my rant.

This year Halloween came and went, and the following day I needed to stop by Target to pick up a few odds and ends. But as I walked into the door, I couldn't help but groan. There in front of me, were gigantic Christmas ornaments hanging from the ceiling. Red, green and silver were everywhere. Don't get me wrong, I love Christmas and celebrating the birth of our Lord Jesus...but only when it's CHRISTMAS TIME! Then, two weeks ago, which was the first week of November, Alli and I are driving back home to our apartment when all of the sudden we see three homes, lit up and fully decorated for Christmas. One even already had a tree up and decorated!

Think of this as a little food for thought.

Starting Christmas too early not only takes the focus off of Thanksgiving, but it also takes the fun and excitement out of Christmas. In my opinion, having to wait to decorate and open up all those Christmas boxes we have stored away for the year makes me appreciate them more because I only see them for one month out of the year. By doing so, it helps me really focus on giving thanks for my family, friends, and everything God has provided for us. So this year, keep the Christmas decorations in their boxes until after Thanksgiving. That way we can completely focus on what we are supposed to really be doing...GIVING THANKS.

The Flame

2009-10-30T16:13:00.000-07:00

A little while ago, I was approached by Dania at our church if I would be interested in helping her write a short play for church. I didn't know that this would really help me open my eyes to the fact that I am really beginning to enjoy writing. Below is the video of the performance. We really wanted to show that people need to take advantage of the gifts that God has given them, no matter where they are in their life. I also had the pleasure of acting in it as well. Enjoy.

The Crazies Come Out During the Holidays

2009-10-30T15:42:00.000-07:00

Alli and I follow a few blogs and sites that are pretty funny, and with Halloween right around the corner it seems as if everyone is out to have some fun. This includes cats, cake makers, and an ewok that really loves Al Roker. Just see for yourself.

For cake madness, click here.

For zombie cats, click here.

And for frisky Ewoks, just check out the video below.

School, Sickness and Stones

2009-09-18T13:51:00.000-07:00

What a beginning of the year. It has definitely started with a bang. My class is wonderful this year. A little chatty, but I have yet to see any signs of defiance or any mean students. But just like every year before, the beginning of the year came crashing down on me. There's nothing like going from only interacting with a few people a day to having a school full of 600 plus kids that are all sniffling and sneezing. So it didn't take long before I was feeling ill. And then on top of that, the first Sunday of the year where I had to play was accompanied with severe back pain. I honestly thought it was a kidney stone. I was wondering if I had done something to deserve all of these misfortunes all at the same time. Luckily, there was no kidney stone, I'm feeling better thanks to the doc, and the year is now sliding into it's groove. Sheesh! What a beginning of the year.

But every bad thing always has a silver lining. That silver lining came to me in the form of a song from one of my good friends, Jay McKenney. It's entitled "Kidney Stone". You can click here to listen to it. Enjoy.

My Favorite

2009-08-19T20:05:00.000-07:00

Through the summer, there has been a ton of pic of Clark...so many that I have to refrain from putting them all on the blog. But as the summer comes to a close, I have found my favorite. There's nothing like a boy and his dad both looking handsome for the camera at the Oregon Zoo.

An Unexpected Surprise

2009-08-10T21:40:00.000-07:00

The zoo is usually the place where you go to see animals. But not this time. As my family and I were taking a break at one of the many benches in the Portland Zoo, I was busy watching people. But as I scanned the crowd, I came across a familiar face. But I had to be sure it was him before I walked up to him. So I waited to hear his accent. As soon as he opened his mouth and his Irish accent became apparent, I was already up and making a move to introduce myself. But as I got closer, I totally blanked on his name. I knew he was Badger on Firefly, Romo Lampkin on Battlestar, Tanaka on Dollhouse, and I even just recently saw him on an old season one X-Files episode as a pyrokinetic assassin named Bob the caretaker. But what do you say to an actor that you remember his characters and not his name? The answer is anything but "Hey, are you that guy from Battlestar?". But before I could stop myself, that was exactly what I said, to which his answer was yes. My inner fanboy was giggling with glee. He politely introduced himself as Mark Sheppard, introduced his family, and we began talking. He said he was in town shooting "Leverage" and that he was taking a break with his family. I explained that I loved his work on BSG and loved all of his characters. He was so friendly and humble. We talked about BSG, how he missed it, his work as a villain on Burn Notice, and his family. He was even kind enough to take a picture with me. What an awesome guy! I just hope he was the kind of actor that is flattered by people knowing his characters instead of his real name. Oops. Oh well.

Clark's New Obsessions

2009-07-24T14:08:00.000-07:00

These last few weeks have really begun to show me that Clark is definitely my son.

Example 1: We've been trying to make him laugh by making odd noises and the only thing that will make him laugh is a fart sound. Typical boy.

Example 2: He loves to play. He also loves variety. Whether it be on his play mat, bouncer, swing, or sitting in his Bumbo, he loves to wiggle and giggle his way through the day.

Example 3: The boys already likes watching TV. But not just any TV. He loves cartoons. So this morning the two of us sat in front of the tele and watched Superman. As you can see, he couldn't keep his eyes off it.

Random Road Trip Moments

2009-06-29T13:08:00.001-07:00

Lots of things can happen on a road trip. Some good, some bad. Now that we are done with the first half of our trip, I would like to give out a few awards to places and individuals we encountered on the way to California.

The Cheesiest Road Sign Award: This award goes out to the city of Weed, CA. As you enter the city there is a sign that says, "WEED like to welcome you!" This made both Alli and I groan. Clark, on the other hand, was speechless.

The Super Origami-Man Award: While stopping at a BK in Redding, CA, for lunch, we met a man who had the knack for folding paper. When we sat down he was in the process of making a little girl at the table next to us a T-rex. Then, as he was leaving, he gave Clark the gift of a dollar that had been folded into a tiny little collared shirt. It was so cool! I was totally inspired by this man who used his gift of paper folding to bring a little joy to others around him.

The Coolest Invention Award: Everyone has seen those vending machines that you come across in the bathrooms at truck stops. They dispense everything from aspirin to condoms to fake tattoos. But Alli and I saw a new one. Cologne. This machine had five different spray nozzles that will squirt your choice of imitation scents on you for only a few measly coins. The silliest thing was that in order to get your neck up to the nozzles, most people of average height would have to stand on their tippy toes. Sheer genius!

The Most Thoughtful Train Conductor Award: On the final stretch of road on the way to Fresno, we came across a train crossing our path. Not a problem...usually. With only one and a half train cars left to go, the conductor stopped the train. Just when we thought we were almost there, we had to turn around after waiting 15 minutes. Thanks a bunch, inconsiderate train conductor man!

The Ding-dong-McGee Award: This one goes out to yours truly. We made our first stop of the road trip at the Woodburn outlets, which was only about 45 minutes from our home. Alli pulled out a brand new container of formula for Clark. The tab to open the container broke off as she tried to open it. Without even thinking, I said, "Just hand it to me. I can open it." I pulled out my keys. The sharp edge of a key would be more than enough to pop the top of the container. So I took the key and pushed. Good news, the can was open. Bad news, in my rush to open the container, I opened it a little too hard. With a nice firm push, I pushed the key, and my fist, to the bottom of the can. Formula shot everywhere, coating Clark and the entire backseat of the car with a hefty dose of white powder. Clark stared at me in shock. Alli laughed out loud. And I, not wanting to curse in front of my child, began to spurt out the closest thing possible to what I truly wanted to say. "Ef! Ef, ef, ef, ef, ef, ef, ef!" One hour later, after a good vacuuming and a much needed cool-down period, we made our way to California.

It's Over

2009-06-16T20:44:00.000-07:00

Finally, the school year is over. It was good to see the kids go, but as always a little tough to let go of all the kiddies as they go to the next grade. As you can see for yourself, they all turned out great by the end of the year. Don't they all look so smart?

Countdown

2009-06-10T09:09:00.000-07:00

The end of the year is usually quite hectic. The kids get wilder with each passing day. They also keep track of the days that are left in the year. Today makes it 3 days left of school. I can remember making the paper chains and tearing a ring every day until I was down to the last day. Students still do this today. But the one thing that the students don't know is that teachers count down the days more than they do. Man, I can't wait for Friday to be over! Summertime here we come!

The End of the Season

2009-05-30T13:34:00.000-07:00

So many things have or are about to end. Being married with out kids. Over. School. 10 days till it's over (and yes, I'm counting). Premiere League. Manchester United were champs yet again! Our old couches. Passed on to another while new ones are on the way. Cold days. Over. Summer is peaking it's pretty head finally in our neck of the woods. And so many TV shows. The seasons are over while we wait to see what will happen. And since I won't be teaching summer school, I've made a list of things to do to carry me through the summer. Hope I didn't leave anything out.

Books to Read: The Book of Lies - Brad Meltzer, Wizard's First Rule - Terry Goodkind, and finish as many Harry Potter books as I can before the next movie comes out.

Games to Play with people who I want to hang out with: Carcassonne with Alli, WOW Minis with Chris, Zombies with Clint, and Fifa 09 with Sean and Tyler.

Places I want to go to: Visalia for Chris and Mimi's wedding, Forest Park for some hiking, more Timber's games, and the church basement to record music for the church.

Eating Crow

2009-05-29T11:55:00.000-07:00

It's quite funny to look back on those times when you spewed out some silly phrase in the past about something in particular and have to eat your own words. For example, I used to complain to my wife about how I always wanted to see more posts from my friends (who all happen to have kids). We'll now it's my turn to eat a little crow. It's been three weeks since my last post. 3 weeks and about 300 diapers later. Oh, how kids can take up your time. And it's not that I don't want to share information or posts about things going on with my friends. It's just that now there is another person that I want to spend more time with than sitting on the computer typing. Funny how things change.

To My Wife and Mother of My Son

2009-05-10T15:28:00.000-07:00

Has it already been almost 9 years since the two of us met at Sugar Pine? It's amazing to think about our journey that we have already had over the last (almost) decade. Dating for 2 and a half years. Engaged for 6 months. And married for almost 6 years. It's also fun to think back about what we said about having kids. Three years was the first agreement. Then three years passed and we both thought that we were having too much fun. But two years later we thought it was time and now look at us. God must have had things all planned out. Not only did he come at a great time, but now you and I will get to spend the summer together with Clark. What a ride! But the one constant thing I have continued to see over the last (almost) 9 years is that I love you just as much as I did when I realized I wanted to marry you. It's probably even more. You continue to help me become a good man and a better husband. And with this day being your first Mother's Day, I have to say that I can't wait to see you help our son become a good man as well. I know you'll love, care, encourage, and nurture him just as much as you do for me. I love you, Alli! And you are, even thought it's only been for 20 days, a great mom. Happy Mother's Day!

Kung-Fu Midnight Madness

2009-04-23T04:03:00.001-07:00

Remember in the old days when you could only go see kung-fu movies at the midnight showings? Well Clark and I have started a new tradition. With mommy needing more rest, we're able to catch up on some Hong Kong cinema classics. So even though it's 3 A.M. as I type, it's nice to know that I now have someone to watch kung-fu movies with.

Tonight's Kung-Fu Double Feature:
Rumble in the Bronx and Righting Wrongs (Also known as Above the Law)

Clark Alden Porter is Here!

2009-04-21T11:12:00.000-07:00

Check out Clark! He's awesome and we love him! And I'm a dad! Wow!

You can see more of Clark and the family by clicking here. Check it out!

13 to Go

2009-04-16T10:26:00.000-07:00

I can't believe that there is only 13 days left until our due date. I'm really starting to get to the point where I am really ready to meet my son. So is Alli...and so are Alli's feet. It's been cool to watch the changes happen as baby got bigger, and I'm sure that there will be plenty of changes to come that will blow my mind. But it's good to know that for some reason today, I feel completely ready. Now it's just a matter of being patient. Can't wait to finally meet you, C.A.P.!

31 and Counting: #19 - Themed Boxers/Pajamas

2009-04-13T10:32:00.000-07:00

There is something very amusing to me about funny boxers. I can only imagine the thoughts that go through the people's heads as they sit and choose the fabric and prints that they use to make these undergarments. I think I even enjoy it a little more now that I have a wife that thinks that they are just as funny as I do. The list of witty types of boxer prints out there is endless, so here is a list I have compiled of my favorites.

Boxers covered with...

Acorns (or any type of nut)
Super Heroes (They never get old... probably started with Underoos)
Wooden Soldier Nutcrackers
Christmas Packages
Fruit (Haven't seen them with the fruit basket yet, but I'm sure someone will come up with it sooner or later)

The only one I'm surprised I haven't seen yet are treasure chests or some sort of jewels. I know... I have a slightly perverse mind, but I think it's pretty darn funny.

Any boxer prints you've seen lately that have made you laugh?

31 and Counting: #20 - Pubs

2009-04-08T22:25:00.000-07:00

There is something about a good pub. Especially English or Irish pubs. I think it all boils down to this. Good atmosphere + Good Food + Good Beer = Good Pub. Some people think that just because the pub is an English pub that the food doesn't have to be good. But I have to disagree. It has to be good if you are truly going to enjoy yourself. Soccer on the tele is also a wonderful addition as well. Over the years, my friends and I used to (or at least Alli and I still) frequent the pubs we love. Here's the list of pubs you should check out if you ever have the chance.

There was The Old Ship in Fullerton, CA. We love that place because of the late 40s English waitresses that would call you "love". It's known for it's red phone booth outside.
There was The Old Ship's sister pub, The Crown and Anchor in Monterey, CA, which was like Cheers, where you have to walk downstairs to get to the pub. It was dark and musty, but was all English.
BC's Pizza and Beer is as close as you can get to a pub in Clovis, CA. You can take a 50 beer tour around the world and get a plaque on the wall. I made it 1 1/2 times around the world. My plaque reads "If only my mama could see me now." I know. I was a total turd when I wrote this. Sorry, mom.
Kell's Irish Pub in downtown Portland, OR, has to be one of the best. It's nice and classy, but still has the pub feel. They even have a way to stick a dollar and 2 quarters to the ceiling. They say it's "Irish Magic". I have to find out how they do it. But the best thing of all about this pub is their Guiness Shepherd's Pie. Yum!
Last, is a new find. My friend Sean found a pub that plays the Premier games on Saturdays and Sundays. It's called the Horse Brass Pub in Portland, OR. Soccer. Great beer. (They actually have the Old Speckled Hen.) And a totally traditional English Breakfast that comes on a huge plate. Everything was awesome, but I still don't know if I'm a fan of Fried Bread (Yep, it's bread that has been deep fried...that's it.) Here's a pic of Sean and I at the Horse Brass as well.

You would never see this in England. A Man U fan crushing a pint with an Arsenal fan. Sheesh!

OK Hike

2009-04-06T22:08:00.001-07:00

There is nothing like stepping out your door, driving to the forest and hiking on a dreary day. The only thing I usually struggle with is what to listen to as I hike. But since today was drizzling and especially dark, I thought a little Radiohead OK Computer would do well. It did. It was perfect! And it made it even better to hike to the Stone House in Forest Park. It was an old Works Progress Administration (WPA) project in the 1930s but later was abandoned and ruined in the 1962 Columbus Day Storm. It all looked very spooky and ancient. All in all, music + hiking + sweet old houses = a jolly good time.

Mustache March Finale

2009-03-29T09:36:00.001-07:00

All good things must come to an end. But for our wives, this particular "good thing" came to an end way too late. By the end of the month, only Clint and I were left with facial hair that could be mistaken for a black comb being taped to our top lip. And with it being the end, you have to sport the solo mustache. But before I go on to show you our pictures, let's take a walk through memory lane and thank all of the great men of media who helped inspire us through the month of March.

Like Kevin Kline, who rocked a huge comb-like mustache in French Kiss.

Or who can forget Ron Burgundy and his mustache bringing San Diego the nightly news.

And last but not least, Tom Selleck, his mustache, and his baby blue eyes.

All of this manliness you see before you led to this great month, and all we could do was stand tall and proud of our mustaches. At least we can look back in time and say, "Although this may not have been the coolest thing at the time, mustaches were once cool...just not according to our wives."

Although we may have looked like THIS to everyone else around us...

we really felt like THIS. Tough. Manly. And proud of the fact that we can grow hair on our upper lip!

New Song - Mistaken

2009-03-26T22:23:00.000-07:00

This song has been sitting in my mind for some time now. It was one of those songs that never got recorded or even played live. All I had was a tape recording of the song from a past band practice, so I had to make a good recording of it. The song is about how every summer I would go off to camp, away from the norm, and would end up having some sort of summer crush. These usually were very short yet very emotional relationships. You spend the whole week pining for this girl and then by the time you have the courage to make a move, your time is practically over. But along with those relationships came confusion. You can misread physical cues, actions, and words yet still fall head over heals for some girl you don't even know, but for some reason...it's worth it and you'd do it again the following year. If you haven't guessed yet, I loved camp and have fond memories. I mean, that's how I found my wife. :)

To hear the song, just click here or visit http://drop.io/portermusic.

My New Story

2009-03-26T09:10:00.000-07:00

Wild Horse Canyon from the top of the hill.

Two weekends ago, I got to go back to Wild Horse Canyon for this year's Sunset Men's Retreat. I had enjoyed myself so much last year, that I knew I had to go again the following year. Then we found out Donald Miller was going to be the speaker (author of Blue Like Jazz). My excitement level began to rise. He's from Portland and I already had a few of his books. Jay, our worship leader, then asked if I could play for the weekend. Cha-Ching! So now, not only would I be able to hear a great speaker, I would also be able to serve during the event. The icing on the cake was that we got to go up to the camp a day early, hang out, and practice. It couldn't get any better than that.

The whole worship team, Pastor Ron and Donald Miller.

But it did. Don talked about how individuals like ourselves are in the middle of our own personal/faith stories and asked us, "What is the story that you are telling?" and that it all boiled down to asking ourselves who do we want to be/do and going for it. I was moved. Not to say that my story is all that bad, but there are definitely some areas that are rough around the edges. So I began to make a list... a list of all of the things I wanted to do. One thing stuck out. Song writing. For some reason, I felt it was time I stop writing for myself and start writing for God.

God must have been ready for me to give him the reigns. Other members in the team started saying they wanted to be a part of writing worship and making music to share with the church and possibly record. I don't know if I was ready for that but it's in full swing now. I'm just eager to see what happens. As Don said, there may be some conflict, fear, and doubt involved, but if you hang on to your story, God can do awesome things. Personally, I can't wait to see what happens.

Don and me with my mustache - part 2.
(All the kids at school called me Luigi. LOL!)

Birthday Weekend

2009-03-23T12:13:00.000-07:00

It was great to go out and catch up with everyone on my birthday. We did pretty much everything I wanted to do. First we went to Kell's Irish Pub for some grub and brews. They even had on a few soccer matches so that I could watch some footie as well. The best part of all was that most of my friends were there to celebrate with me. Clint and Marla, Sean and Susan and Jake, Mark, Travis and Beth, and Craig and Nicki were all there with Alli and I.

Alli and I love Kell's!

Clint and Marla had a REALLY fun time.

Jake, Sean, and Susan

Mark, Craig, and Travis

Beth and Nicki

After that, we all went back to our place to hang out, have some cake and chill. The only problem is that we didn't have candles and I had to blow out imaginary candles. At least the cake was awesome! Funfetti cake with rainbow chip frosting! This is my favorite cake of all time! It's been the standard since I was really young and Alli makes it for me every year even though she always asks me, "Are you sure you just want rainbow chip cake?" My answer never changes. It's always, "Yes." We also watched one of my favorite shows called MXC...Most Extreme Elimination Challenge. There is nothing like laughing at cheesy overdubbed voices, jokes and other people's pain when they wipe out while trying to perform an obscure challenge. Chris and Nicole Langton also joined up with us at our place. Their gift...beer. And what type of beer did they bring? See for yourself.

Makin' a wish.

The Porter.

Thanks to everyone who was able to make it out and party. It was a blast.

Mustache March: Week 1 - The Tough Guy Look

2009-03-05T11:20:00.001-08:00

That's right... It's Mustache March. Out of the eight of us, only three remain. Ken, our janitor, already had a mustache so he didn't do Full Beard February, but man does his stache look good. As for Clint and I, we are sticking to the plan (unlike Sean, in the background, who is sticking with his trimmed beard). First up in the way of special shaves is the the Tough Guy Look. This is the full chops attached to the mustache. It's the staple for bikers and wrestlers. Sure, most of the ladies we work with think we are crazy, but we don't think anything of it because they thought we were crazy even before we had crazy facial hair. So here it is! Week 1! Up next, the Frenchman!

31 and Counting: #21 - Blogs

2009-03-05T09:20:00.000-08:00

The other day my wife told me about a comment that was left on one of our friends blog. The comment on the blog was something like this... "This blog makes no sense." The more I thought about this comment the more I thought about the true purpose of a blog. The best definition I have ever heard for blogs comes from the title of my friend Phil's blog. In his blog title it says, "A blog for you... and by you I mean me." Sure, blogs can be written for many reasons, but that is the best part about a blog. You can write about whatever you want. It doesn't have to make sense. As long as the writer is content with what he or she is writing about, who cares if it doesn't make sense. Blogs can be used to share stories, pictures, ideas, songs, random thoughts, sheer stupidity and any other reason you can think of. That's why I love them. They reflect the author's creativity and thoughts, as well as their passions and ideas. So keep blogging for others... and by others I mean you.

31 and Counting: #22 - Trade Paperbacks

2009-03-04T09:17:00.000-08:00

A couple of years ago, I made the transition of buyer of comic books to buyer of trade paperbacks. What is a trade paperback? A trade paperback is a collection of comic books that collect a complete story arc. Although trade paperbacks don't grow in value over time like comic books, they tend to be cheaper and don't take up as much room.

At first, I was really against the idea of buying trade paperbacks. The only reason you would buy one is if you couldn't get your hands on rare issues and wanted to read the (usually important) story arc. But after I got married and the number of boxes of comics began to grow in my closet (10 boxes!), I decided enough was enough. It was no surprise that my wife wholeheartedly agreed. But as time passed by, I realized that a few things were changing for the better. First, I wasn't spending as much money. Second, if the trade paperback wasn't good, I could sell it back to a used book store to get money to buy a new one. You can even filter out the bad stuff by reading reviews of the comics to see if you even want or need to read it. Lastly, no longer do I need to wait to read a complete story. It's all there. Sure I have to wait a long time for the next trade paperback to come out, but that waiting time is filled with reading other trades.

31 and Counting: #23 - Shepherd's Pie

2009-02-27T15:15:00.000-08:00

I know that year after year I have said that Taco Salad is my favorite food of all time...but there is a new food coming in at a close second that is constantly pushing the envelope of "Ben's Favorite Food," Shepherd's pie is that food. I don't know what it is, but over the last year I have started to love particular things that are simple yet satisfying. First off there's lots of meat in it that's mixed up with a bunch of vegetables. On top of that, it's all swimming in a pool of gravy, many a times which has dark beers in the mix. And then all of that is covered completely with the best comfort food of all time... mashed potatoes! I also love when it's been put in the broiler and the top of it is nice and crispy. Finally, the best part about shepherd's pie is that my wife knows how to make it and makes it well. Go Alli!

Birthday Morning Surprise!

2009-02-25T08:43:00.000-08:00

There's nothing like being woken up at 5 A.M. in the morning, on your birthday, by the sound of your cat vomiting on your bed. I guess she felt like she needed to give me something on my birthday. What a special thing it was, too. And on top of that, there is nothing more fun than searching the floor in a pitch black room searching for cat vomit while your eyes are trying to adjust to the little light that you have in the room.

For some odd reason, I think this birthday will be one of those ones that just sticks out in your mind as "that" birthday. Yipee!

31 and Counting: #24 - Forgiving Blog Readers

2009-02-24T08:42:00.000-08:00

I know, I know. I am one of the most non-consistent blog posters in the world. But thanks to people like you who read my blog, I am always encouraged to write more. Most people would just stop reading and move onto something else, but you haven't. Thanks for reading and checking in all of the time.

31 and Counting: #25 - Scarves

2009-02-18T07:38:00.000-08:00

I've never been a fan of accessorizing. I had an earring at one time but it didn't last too long (even though it's now been 7 years since I wore one and I still to this day have a hole in my ear). But there is something about a scarf that just makes sense to me. It's not to flashy. It serves the purpose of keeping your neck warm, which is great for those cold Oregon days. They can be home made or store bought. It also can bring in a little color to spice things up. Scarves are also a great way to support your local soccer team. Scarves with team names can be swung around or held high in support of your team at a game or even be worn around town to show pride in your team. Lastly, there are so many different ways to wear a scarf. You can hang it on your neck, wrap it around, or double it over and pull it through (I've been told that this is the Euro way to wear a scarf). And the best thing is, scarves last a really long time. You could even begin to have a scarf collection if you wanted to. Man, I LOVE SCARVES!

31 and Counting: #26 - No Longer Being A Bachelor

2009-02-17T08:43:00.000-08:00

Sure, you can have a lot of fun when by yourself, but after a weekend without the wife, I learned that, although I enjoy doing things with my friends, it's not as much fun when you don't have someone to share it with. I am a people person and thrive off of personal interactions with others. It's not that I can't be alone. It's just that I would rather hang out with someone. I guess it's a good thing I have a wife that enjoys spending time with me as well.

31 and Counting: #27 - Fifa Soccer 2009

2009-02-11T11:43:00.000-08:00

If I didn't have a video game on my list of things I like, I would be a bad gamer. So here I go. Since I just talked about the Wii, I thought it would be appropriate to talk about the one game that I just can't get enough of, which is FIFA Soccer 2009. First off, I'm a sucker for a good soccer game because scoring goals is tons of fun, even if it's not in real life. But the real kicker of this game is the inclusion of the Manager Mode, which wasn't on last years version for the Wii. So in other words, you get to choose a club and manage it. Buying, selling, and coaching has never been so much fun. There's nothing like taking a scrub team and turning it into a super club at the top. On top of all of that footy fun, this years game also includes an 8-on-8 game mode that is a total arcade style version of the game, along with the fun feature of playing with your own Mii (a Wii version you make to resemble yourself). I know it's just a game and I know (and Alli knows) that I can spend tons of time playing, but it's clean (not filled with violence or other crud), fun, is great to play with friends. Good thing it came out this year and not when I was 13. I would have never left the house.

31 and Counting: #28 - The Wii

2009-02-09T09:59:00.000-08:00

Being part of the generation that grew up with video games, I am always a sucker for a good time with a game system. I can remember the day I got my first game system. I had saved up all of my money to purchase a Sega Genesis. It was so cool. The sleek black system with the three button controllers. And then I moved onto the Playstation. And then onto the PS2. But now that a PS3 costs $500, I couldn't stand dropping that much cash just to buy a system and then pay more on top of that to get games. Gladly, Nintendo released the Wii.

The thing I love the most about the Wii is that I have endless options of entertainment. If you want to play old school games like Super Mario Bros. or Streets of Rage, you can do it with the simple purchase of the game off of the web, and then the game is installed onto your own system. If you want to dive into motion style games, you can do this by playing games like Wii Sports. Then comes my favorite...the shooting games. It's just like back in the day when we would go to the arcade and drop millions of quarters into Operation Wolf. You can also drive with the Wii Wheel as well with Mario Kart. I know that there are only a few games that take you through a huge story, like Resident Evil 4, but it's perfect for a person like me who only has limited time to play games. And the best part of it is... Alli even plays every once in a while. (She even out drives me in Mario Kart! Arg!)

31 and Counting: #29 - Rain

2009-02-04T09:48:00.000-08:00

I know, I know. I live in Oregon and I love the rain. The funny thing about this fact is that everyone around me that knows this thinks that I'm nuts. They think that rain is dreary and dull and the days are way too dark. They also complain that multiple days of rain make it so that people have to stay inside. Well not me. I love the rain. I love the way it smells right before a rain. Dull, dreary days are relaxing and are perfect for reading and playing video games. Everything looks cleaner after a good rain and the air is much cleaner as well. I like it so much, when we have stretches of days where it doesn't rain, I wake up hoping that it's raining outside. And who says you can't do anything outside when it's raining. You can play soccer, hike, bike, or even play in the mud. There's so many good things that come from rain, I don't know how people could not love it.

31 and Counting: #30 - Full Beard February

2009-02-03T15:21:00.000-08:00

That's right, you heard me. Full Beard February! This happens to be one of the 31 things I love. Most of the men at my school have decided to participate and the beards have already begun to grow. It will be fun to see how we all look with full beards. And the best part of it all... Full Beard February leads to Mustache March! Oh Yeah!

31 and Counting

2009-02-02T09:49:00.000-08:00

The month of February brings many things for all of us. Valentine's Day reminds us to tell the ones we love how much we care for them. Groundhog's Day helps us see how long winter is going to be. But for me, February 25th reminds me that I am one year older. So, since 31 will put me into my "thirties", I thought it would be fun to talk about 31 things that I enjoy. (This will also keep me blogging. :) Even though I'm now 24 days away and will need to do some catching up, here goes.

#31: The knowledge that in less than three months, Alli and I will have a baby. And on top of that, we'll have a boy. I know it sounds silly, but the idea of having a first born son that will carry on the family name seems really special to me. Plus, it will be so much fun to add another member to the family. Now it won't just be Alli and I. It will be Ben, Alli, and the baby. Too much fun!

Sick Days

2009-01-21T15:28:00.000-08:00

Sick days come once in a blue moon for me. But when they do, I guess I need to take advantage of them. Today marks the first sick day in an entire year. I couldn't believe that it had been that long since I had been ill in the last year. This got me thinking about the many things that we have a tendency to forget about. With so much happening in our world that is negative and has a tendency to distract us from the positives, it makes it hard to remember to be grateful for the things we do have...like only having to take one sick day out of an entire year. So, out of a desire to focus on the little things that I rarely do, here is a few things I'm grateful for on my sick day.

Honey and tea...nothing else feels so good on a soar throat.
Technology...not only can I blog, but I can also email, video chat, play games, and watch my dad preach on Sundays.
Substitute teachers...without them I would have had to go in to school today.
Ramen...need I say more.
Silence...I guess I should suck up as much of this as possible before baby Porter arrives.
And last...tissues, because my nose seems to be running a freaking marathon today.

The Man and his Maiden

2009-01-10T20:55:00.000-08:00

A couple of weeks ago, I had a little ditty in my head that turned out to be a catchy tune. Although it wasn't something that I would typically write as a songwriter, I though I might as well write it. Flash forward to last weekend. Hesitantly, I sung the tune to a friend and asked him if he thought it was good enough to record. His answer was an immediate yes. So my friend Travis and I began to organize the music so that it would be a complete song. We recorded the guitars, which sounded great, but only made it half way through the vocals. We literally couldn't do more because I hadn't finished the song. Honestly, I wasn't even planning on recording it that day because it was just an idea when I showed it to Travis. Luckily all it took was one week of writing and another session of recording and we have a rough cut.

The song is entitled "The Man and his Maiden." It's about a man who has it all, but needs a lady. I know that this is a far stretch from my typical Serus Victoria style songs, but I hope you all like it. To listen to it just go to the Porter Music link on the side of the page or just click here. Also, I have posted a few old songs, some new acoustic demos of past songs, and a new cut of "Little Eyes", which was also finished today. Enjoy!

Holiday Cheer Wrap-Up

2009-01-02T15:38:00.000-08:00

It's always funny to look at the holiday season and look at all of the ways we entertain ourselves. Many of us have our traditions that we do, have particular movies that we "have to watch", or music that you have to listen to. For my family, we used to sit around and listen to Dr. Demento's Christmas Album and laugh at all of the funny songs about Christmas, drink eggnog and decorate cookies. As for Alli and I, we have some traditions of our own.

First, we literally cut our first Christmas tree down. Alli watched while I sawed. (I highly doubt this will change over the years.) This is definitely something that we'll continue over the years. The tree was still slightly fresh even when I was taking it down.

Secondly, for the fifth year in a row, we decorated the tree with white lights and silver ornaments. Ali loves it. I finally got up the nerve to explain to her that it just doesn't feel like Christmas without colored twinkly lights. Hopefully, having a kid in the house will sway the vote my way.

Third, Alli and I have things we love to watch. This year we watch...

The Mr. Bean Holiday Special (A Ben Tradition)
The Jeff Dunham Christmas Special (Too Funny!)
The Family Stone (An Alli Tradition)
Love Actually (An Us Tradition)
White Christmas (Us)
National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation (Us again)
A Muppet's Christmas Carol (Another Ben Tradition)

I know, I know. No "It's a Wonderful Life". (Honestly, I can't stand that movie. Bleh.)

And lastly, we made our traditional turkey. (Actually they were cornish game hens) Rosemary, Italian Seasoning, Garlic Salt, Onion powder, and Extra Virgin Olive Oil all mixed up and used to cover the birds inside and out.

All in all, we had a great Christmas and New Years.

Got any of your own traditions that you just have to do during the Christmas season?

New Music

2008-12-30T12:34:00.000-08:00

Over the break, I have had some time to record and write a little. One of the things I have challenged myself to do is to make recordings of all of the songs that we (the guys in Serus Victoria) never had the chance to get into the studio and record. So here is the first one...Shades of Color. It's definitely a love song that describes how you can love a person so much that you can't think or see straight.

I have also been able to do some work on my drop.io/portermusic site. Hopefully the changes that I have made will make it a little easier to navigate and get songs. On it you'll find new studio and demos of songs and even some of my favorite old SV songs. I'll also be posting lyrics to all of the songs that are on there (for those of you that like to know all of the words, help me make changes to lyrics, or just want to sing along :). Enjoy!

To get to the site, click here.

OCD! ARG!

2008-12-24T13:50:00.000-08:00

A while back (I don't know when this all began...probably when I married Alli :) I began to become very meticulous about keeping things organized. First was all of the DVDs. There are "our" DVDs (all alphabetically ordered and numerically ordered by series), and my DVDs (Anime has a section all of it's own and is alphabetical, and there is a kung-fu area that is organized by actor and by release date). Then there are my comics (alphabetical and numerically ordered). And my games (All nice and neat and in their own box or case, which are usually organized by teams). Lastly, with all of this snow and major rearranging for future baby, Alli asked me, "What are all of those binders for?" They happened to be binders full of cards for a game called VS, which were already organized by set and number). And with the simple words of "Can you clean those up?", Alli created a monster. I know, I know. How can you organize them even more if they are already in binders and sets? Leave it to me to turn something easy into something completely difficult. So I proceeded to take out every card, place them in teams, by points, in alphabetical order and then put them back into the card sleeves, leaving no spaces in between to save as much space as possible. Needless to say, I now have this calm feeling just knowing that everything is now in it's right space (and changed from 8 binders to only 4 - Ha!) Here is what it all ended up looking like. I hope you're happy now, Alli.

Christmas Break Comes Early

2008-12-19T08:04:00.000-08:00

People who live in other parts of the world, who know how to function during snow, must be laughing their heads off at us Oregonians right now. Today marks the fifth snow day in a row. In my mind, when the word snow day is said, I picture huge piles of snow. But here, all it takes is a little ice and schools close. That's all good with me. That just means that my Christmas Break officially started today. Yipee!

All I want for Christmas is...

2008-12-18T21:11:00.000-08:00

Meat smelling body spray! That's right. Burger King has just released it's holiday scent...FLAME by BK. It's a meat scented body spray that's there for you when you think to yourself, "Hey, you know what? I really want to smell like a flame-broiled Whopper right now." (Feel free to insert your own play on words here.) I guess this is good for those men who are dating carnivores, but what about those who have vegetarian girlfriends will be out of luck. All I know is, if I can look as good as the King does in this picture when I'm his age, I won't need any meat-scented mojo-helping body spray to get my wife's attention.

Snow Days and Mixed Feelings

2008-12-16T09:16:00.000-08:00

First of all, it's freaking cold up here. On Sunday morning, it began to dump snow on the greater Portland area and dropped down to the twenties over the last few days. Sunday was beautiful, but it came with some problems. Not only did Alli and I miss church, but we also were not able to go see My Name is Bruce on Sunday night. Bruce was even going to be there to talk about the movie. We even had tickets. ARG! Darn you, snow! But shortly after being disappointed with the missing of the movie, I was soon overjoyed to find out the Monday, and also Tuesday, School was canceled. Early spring break! Sweet. The only real problems is that it's still stinking cold. Brrrrr.

Things Sinking In

2008-12-12T09:32:00.001-08:00

It's an odd thing to go into a doctor's office and finally get introduced to your child. Sure, you get to see them in that initial ultrasound, but at that point in time the baby only looks like a little blob. But when you actually see a little person in there, you can't help but be amazed. Then there is that moment of shock where your brain actually snaps back into reality and you realize that the little, squirming baby on the screen will be here soon. That's what this week has been like for me. I think this is probably how it is for all men. Since we can't feel the baby moving in the first half of our wife's pregnancy, it's all very abstract and out there. Also, when you don't know the sex of the baby, the child is in the strange phase of being an it.

Now "it" has been changed to "he" and everything is sinking in. We can begin to settle on a name for him. We can plan what his room will look like. And now we don't have to take boy and girl hand-me-downs and wait to see what we're going to have. It's also cool knowing that the family name will be passed down to yet another generation of Porter men. Sure, life will change because he'll be in our lives, but at this point in time I really can't think of anything more awesome than what life will be like with him in our lives. To say I'm excited would be an understatement.

Three words...

2008-12-09T18:32:00.001-08:00

IT"S A BOY!!!

To see pics, click here.

Fresno Trip: Part Two

2008-12-09T18:07:00.001-08:00

So to keep things fresh and fast, here are some pics with four word captions of what happened in Fresno after my grandfathers memorial service. All in all, it was really tiring, fun, and fast.

Mimi got engaged...

I toasted to them...

Met Jamie's dog, Lucy....

Hung with Jamie's kids...

Held Abi and Ethan...

Saw the Rojeski Family.

12:45 A.M. Scott, tacos, doughnuts...

Saw JT, Ash, & Quinn...

and Edo-ya with friends.

Unmet Expectations

2008-12-07T11:37:00.000-08:00

Last night I went over to a friends house to watch the big de la Hoya vs Pacquiao fight. All week long, all I heard was that the fight was going to be spectacular. So of course one can't help but have high hopes. Sadly, it didn't pan out how they predicted. In eight rounds, de la Hoya was pounded and looking pathetic so they threw in the towel. The more frustrated we all got, the more I began to think, "When was the last time I saw a good boxing match?" Sadly, I don't think I could think of one in the last ten years where I was dazzled. Granted, I don't have the means to watch boxing all that much, but on the other hand I've seen plenty of MMA events that have left me speechless.

So, with that in mind, do you think that the sport of boxing will ever live up to the hype that they try to create through promotions? Sadly, I don't think boxing will ever be what it used to be... well known fighters or available for the masses to see (not via pay-per-view).

Arg! I hate being let down. :(

Red Devils Keep on Winning

2008-12-04T12:15:00.000-08:00

It's always a good thing when your team continues to win. Manchester United not only won in their last home game against Manchester City, but also moved one step closer to the top of the table due to Liverpool tying and Chelsea being beat by Arsenal. This is also great for the fans, since this means that there is only a difference of 9 points between the top five teams (and Man U only 6 points away from the leader with a game in hand). There is nothing better than having a tight run at the top of the tables.

Other Soccer News:

Even though he brought the Black Cats up to the Premier League over the past few years, "The Skipper," Roy Keane, exits as coach to Sunderland. The Black Cats have already begun a search for a replacement. No news as of yet on who they will try to put in his place. We'll miss you Roy.
Argentina's golden boy, Carlos Tevez, must be tired of riding the pine. In his last game he was put in as a starter for the first time in a while and scored 4 goals. My guess is that he wants to make it a point that he should be a starter for Man U. On another note, Argentina will definitely have a good squad this upcoming World Cup.
Arsenal lose in the Carling Cup. They must not think it's that important to win considering they only put in their scrubs to start. Oh well. Man U on the other hand, won and advance to the semifinals.

Pics of the Fresno Trip, Part 1

2008-12-01T12:56:00.000-08:00

Grandpa's Memorial Service

All of the cousins were able to finally get together.

Three generations of Porter men.

Mom, Dad, Jamie and the kids and I were all at the service.

Jamie and I.

Later, at Grandma's, I got to try on Grandpa's old uniform. Pretty awesome!

We also dressed up in some of Grandpa's hats and had some fun with Grandma.

All in all, it all adds up to great memories.

Happy Turkey Day!

2008-12-01T12:47:00.001-08:00

Hope all of you had as much fun as I did. Happy Thanksgiving!

Back in the Saddle

2008-11-26T09:36:00.000-08:00

What a month. First of all, thanks to everyone who was praying for our family. To catch up on past blogging, I thought that the best way to do this would be to post on everything at once so that I can completely catch up. So here we go...

Family - Family is doing well. Jamie's family is growing. All three of the kids look so grown up. And the new addition of Lucy (their dog) is quite a character. Mom and Dad are doing well in Kansas and dad is really enjoying working at his new church. It was great to see them all since Alli and I won't be able to see them this Christmas season. I also was surprised to come home (to my old apartment which is now Chris' apartment) the first night I was there to find that Chris had proposed to Amelia (Alli's sister) and she said yes. One step closer to having a new bro in the family. I'm totally excited! We even got to celebrate Amelia's birthday/engagement with Paul and Julia over lunch.
Friends - Ah, the boys. It was great to see them all. Scott and I accomplished the trifecta...a couple of drinks at Starline, 7 tacos at Tacos De Tijuana, and then on to Foster's Donuts for our usual maple bars and blueberry sprinkles. Needless to say, my stomach was doing back flips after that one. The next day was great as well. I got to see the latest addition to the Serus Victoria Baby Clan. Quinn (JT's new baby boy) was beautiful. JT and Ashley were very attentive and awesome parents. We also got the entire gang together and had a blast at Edo-Ya, my favorite sushi place in Fresno. It was fun, but I also began to realize how much I missed the guys and the band.
Church - Playing on Sunday and preparing for tonight's Worship Night has led to a very busy week. I'll be sure to post pictures from the worship night.
Alli and Baby - Two weeks till we can find out the sex of the baby. She's doing well and has yet to get sick. We've been very lucky with the whole "no sickness" thing. Hopefully that is a clue to a future easy birth. I think it's a boy, but Alli thinks it's a girl. I guess we'll see in a few weeks.
Music - Trudging along trying to write some new material. Also trying to rewrite some lyrics for old songs. It seems some of my old band mates think that the past few songs I have written have had some "cheesy" lyrics. I'll see what I can do. Currently I'm working on writing my first folk-ish song called "Senses of You." I'll release it as soon as it's finished.
Soccer - Top four teams in the league are Chelsea, Liverpool, Manchester United, and (surprise surprise) Aston Villa. Arsenal presently find themselves in fifth due to lack of consistent playing. This weeks big games are the battle for Manchester (Man U vs Man City) and Chelsea vs Arsenal. Should be a fun weekend. Go Man U!
Stuff - This week marks the Oregon Civil War - Oregon State vs Oregon. As silly as this sounds, people all around town are sporting their teams colors (Orange and Black or Green and Yellow). Crazy Oregonians!
Lastly, Happy Thanksgiving!

For those interested...

2008-11-18T12:16:00.000-08:00

Last week, I was in Visalia for my grandfather's memorial service. It was actually a wonderful service. The music was upbeat and fun. It was a true celebration of life. My mom, her two sisters, and my father even got to talk to us all and share some funny stories about grandpa. It was a wonderful reminder of how awesome he was and of how much he loved God. Here is the link to my Grandfather's obituary. It says it all... including a nod to our 1/2 of a great grand child.

Grandpa Bud's Obituary

New Music - Something

2008-11-11T17:53:00.000-08:00

Finally I was able to finish the demo of my latest track entitled "Something". Although it has nothing to do with my life now, it has everything to do with the fact when people are single, they are looking for someone with that special something. And it's usually not something that is typical that catches your eye initially. It's the obscure and odd things that usually stand out. Without giving too much away and allowing you all to interpret it the way you want to in your own head, you can listen to it at Porter Music. Just click on "Something" to hear or even download it. Feel free to pass it on, or not, and tell me what you think about it. Go ahead and critique it as much as you want since it is a demo. The more ideas on the table, the better. Enjoy. Here are the lyrics as well.

Something
Written by B. Porter
Copyright 2008

Verse 1
Say Something…You know that everything will turn out just fine
Wait a moment…You know you’ve got to get the timing just right

Pre-Chorus 1
I’ve thought for hours, even long days and nights
It’s just a new beginning but it’s welling up inside

Chorus 1
There’s something about you girl that makes you attractive
I don’t know what it is, but I think that I like it

Verse 2
Walk on over…you know you have to make your dream become real
Don’t panic…you know you have to let her know how you feel

Pre-Chorus 2
I really need to warn you so I’m gonna let you know
You make me feel like a ticking bomb and I’m ready to explode
So it’s off, away I go

Chorus 2
There’s something about you girl that makes you attractive
I don’t know what it is, but I think that I like it
There’s something about you girl that makes you exotic
I don’t know what it is, but I know that I like it… like it… like it

Bridge
Something sweet, something mean
Something that’s bold and scary, something extraordinary
Something real, something free
Something that’s young and spiteful, something that’s clearly delightful,

Verse 3
Say Something…You hope that everything will turn out just fine
Don’t wait a moment…Before she leaves and it’s your final goodbye

Kickin' It

2008-11-08T13:51:00.000-08:00

This last Friday, McKinley teachers were kicking it old school with a little game of kickball. For once, we were the ones playing, instead of officiating the game. The best part of the game was how we played it. Since we Oregonians are now heading into the rainy season, there is no chance that we would be able to play outside. Don't get me wrong, I love a good play in the mud, but being muddy at the end of a long Friday isn't many people's idea of a good time. The game was played in the gym, which meant new rules. All balls are fair. You can catch anything and it's out, no matter what it hits, as long as it hasn't yet touched the ground. Lastly, home runs happen if you can kick it out the double doors that lead to the hallway. The game was tight. Honestly, I don't even remember who won, but we all had a good time. Check it out.

Pitching it for the ladies.

Sean in mid swing.

Megan goes for the well placed kick.

Gretchen in flight before the boot.

Even Mama Twigg came out and kicked a few.

Fixing the Gates

2008-11-05T08:44:00.000-08:00

As a young boy, I always loved going over to my Grandpa Bud's house. He and Grandma Girl (we called her that because we couldn't pronounce the name Verle) lived out in the country and had a barn and walnut orchards that we used to play in. But the one thing that I always loved was that Grandpa was always tinkering with some sort of gadget that wasn't working. He would be all dressed up in his grubby work clothes, hands covered in grease, thinking about how to fix the problem at hand. To this day, I still can't think of a time when he wasn't able to fix something. He was unstoppable. No broken part or engine would stand in his way from having a well running, working machine. And he would take any moment he could to explain what he was doing and how "with a little elbow grease" things would get done and taken care of.

Last night, my Grandpa Bud passed away. I know that this is a sad moment for all of us in the family, but I have chosen to take this time to reflect on how awesome he was. He was a strong willed man. He served his country well and in the process met and married the woman he loved till the day that he died. He knew how to work hard and be productive and we all loved him for it. He was a teacher to any listening ear (especially when it came to anything on the farm), and was always encouraging in his own gruff manner. Best of all, he was a man of God who shared the good news of Jesus all around the world. Even though I really miss him and always will, I can't help but think of what my dad said to me as he shared the news of grandpa's death. "He's fixing the gates and getting them ready for us in the future." I can picture him now, swinging the gates to see if they are level, listening intently to make sure they don't squeak. Personally, I just can't wait to see him when we get there.

Below is my favorite picture of the two of us together. Me sitting on the old white fence, almost a young man with an ear-to-ear smile on my face. The orange tree with the oranges that made the best fresh squeezed orange juice in the background. And him, looking at me with that grin, probably thinking to himself what a crazy grandson I was. But most important, both of us totally happy to be spending time together.

Grandpa and Me - 1993

My Costume

2008-11-01T15:44:00.000-07:00

Having lived in California for the majority of my life, I've ran into my fair share of different sports fans. Since California has so many stinking teams to choose from, one can get lost amongst the hoards of fans. But there is one thing that you learn about all of these fans...no fans are crazier than Raider's fans. So, since I actually own a Raiders jersey (I know, I know...But it says Porter on the back), I thought it would be fitting to go as one of those crazed Raiders fans. And all it took was a little bit of shaving to really bring the costume together. Have a look for yourself.

Life at Sunset

2008-10-31T10:15:00.000-07:00

There is always something awesome going on at Sunset (Alli's and my church home). Luckily, I have been able to be involved in many of the areas of the service that happen in front of the entire church. Just so that all of you can see some of the excellence that goes on here, I want to share a couple of videos with you. The first is a video of many of our church's individuals saying the Apostles Creed. I love that it shows all of us (young and old) saying the same thing.

The second is a performance from this last Sunday where some of the leaders at our church got up in front of the congregation and shared their life verses. This was great and went well with the theme of running the marathon of life. To help split up the verses, Jay chose to have the song "Word of God Speak" sang in between the sections. I was lucky enough to be asked to sing it in both services. I know it's a bit long, but it really gives you a feel for the great things that are going on at our church. Enjoy!

Oops!

2008-10-29T21:19:00.000-07:00

This week has been chalked full of funny things. Having parent conferences and long hours always leads to funny stories. Here are a few of them.

While asking one of my students "What is one thing that you're proud of that you have done in the classroom?", her brother (about a second later) farted loudly on the chair next to her (on accident, of course). We all just sat there looking at each other silently waiting to see who would crack first. As soon as her dad started laughing, we all lost it...for about two minutes. The only thing I could say to her was, "At least you can be proud of the fact that you,ve never farted in my class." All we could do was laugh our way through the end of the conference.

Looking back on my life, there are many times in the past when I wish that I had just kept my mouth shut instead of saying something that I shouldn't have said. Today was one of them. Our PE teacher had some students turn in two softballs that they found on the field. They happened to be promotional softballs for Hungry Howie's Pizza. All you had to do was call in an order and you got a free large pizza for each softball that you had. So I called and asked if the promotion was still on and if we could get a single large pizza. After talking to the manager and found out that the deal was good, he transferred me back to the female receptionist. But in my excitement of getting a free pizza, I stopped and though that it would be easier to get two free pizzas instead of one. So instead of asking for a second pizza, I uttered, "Actually, I have two balls." All I heard was silence on the other end of the line. Everyone in the staff room started cracking up. All of the sudden it donned on me what I had actually said. I then tried to spit out the fact that I had two "softballs" (which made me and my teacher friends laugh even harder) and wanted two free pizzas. You can only imagine where the conversations went from there. Although this was quite embarrassing (the receptionist started laughing when I arrived at the pizza place with my two balls), at least we ate for free today.

Holy Mid-Week Games Batman!

2008-10-28T11:40:00.000-07:00

With parent teacher conferences starting this week, I totally forgot to check when the following games for the week were and found out that all of the games are either today or tomorrow. So I'm gonna make this one quick. Hopefully I'll be able to do a little better on my predictions than 40% like last week. For more information from this past week in the Premier League, click here.

Porter's Picks for Week 9:

Tuesday, October 28th, 2008

Newcastle vs WBA - With both teams on a loosing streak, I'm gonna have to say that having home advantage will probably help Newcastle take home the win...even though they are 19th place in the league.

Wednesday, October 29th, 2008

Aston Villa vs Blackburn: Villa won big last week. Villa has made it a point to push their way to the top over the last few years. Look for them to win over Blackburn.
Fulham vs Wigan: Both teams aren't doing so well as of late. Even with the unbelievable goals of Zaki, Wigan still finds themselves near the bottom. Fulham has been improving over the last few weeks with a couple of draws. I think with the home advantage, Fulham can pull this one off just as long as they can shut down Zaki.
Hull City vs Chelsea: Here's the game of the week. Hull City has beat Arsenal and Chelsea is coming off of a loss against Liverpool (the first loss at home in a long time - they had a 68 game no losses at home streak going on) they'll either be shaken up or looking for someone to take their aggression out on. But Hull City is like the new mountain that continues to stand tall. And their at home. Hull City all of the way.
Stoke City vs Sunderland: Even though they'll be away from home, Sunderland can win this one over Stoke City.
Arsenal vs Tottenham: Even though the Hot Spurs just took home their first win of the season under new manager Harry Redknapp, Arsenal at home will be too strong for them to beat.
Bolton vs Everton: After the last two weeks, Everton has been impressive. They scored first against Arsenal and help Man U to a tie last week. I'm calling Everton to win this one.
Liverpool vs Portsmouth: Who can stop the unstoppable team of Liverpool? Defenitely not Portsmouth.
Manchester United vs West Ham United: After last weeks terrible effort against Everton, Man U needs this one bad. With West Ham on a three game loosing streak, Man U should win at home. Let's just pray they don't play as bad as they did last week.
Middlesbrough vs Manchester City: Rhobinho got his first hat trick for Man City last week and Middlesbrough is having a tough time taking home wins. This will be a good time for Man City to take home an away win.

Agree? Dissagree? Don't care? (Even though you should!)

Teachers Like to Have Fun Too!

2008-10-27T07:26:00.000-07:00

Many of us at the school were thinking of ways in which we could have a little fun. First, we started by posting pictures of people on staff in the break room. Sounds harmless, right? The only thing is that we had taken their faces and put them into the Yearbook Yourself program so that everyone looks completely ridiculous. But the more we thought about it, funny pictures weren't going to let us blow off steam at the end of the week. Sure, they were good for a laugh, but we needed something a little more active. So last Friday, a bunch of us gathered for the first time to have our very own Fun Friday. The game was Chair Curling. Teachers push their teammate, who is sitting on one of the new rolling chairs from the break room, and see if they can get they close to a target that is located down the hall. Here are some pics and a video so that you could see all the fun that we had. Congrats to the Crazy-K-Cats for taking home the win. And next week, DODGE BALL!

The whole gang in action.

Clint and I were called Nancy Boys (Thanks Sean) before the start of the game,
so we embraced the name. Go Nancy Boys!

McKinley Staff in Action!

Weekend Double Feature, Part 2

2008-10-26T18:40:00.000-07:00

For the past couple of years, my wife and I have started a new tradition...watching cheesy horror movies on Halloween with a bunch of friends. So the other day we went to our local Blockbuster to pick up some classics. Since Alli really doesn't like being scared, we go for the not-so-scary movies. But as we were going through the isle, I couldn't help but pick up one of my old time favorites, the 1985 horror classic Silver Bullet. I can't tell you how many times I would turn on the Saturday Matinee and see this movie. Here's the gist.

The people of Tarker's Mills have a problem. This problem happens to come with the full moon. One by one, people wind up missing and the townspeople get a little on edge. But the only one who believes that this menace is a werewolf is a 13 year old boy in a wheelchair. Enter Corey Haim. Yes. Only a teen heartthrob could take on a ghastly beast of the night. He, his sister, and Uncle Red (who is none other than the mentally unstable Gary Busey) decide that it's hunting time. But here is the catch. As soon as they getting closer to finding out who the werewolf is, he starts to hunt them. (I guess the flesh of a kid stuck in a wheelchair tastes like veal to a werewolf.) The best part comes when young Mr. Haim is about to get chomped on. So what does he do? He shoots a bottle rocket in the werewolfs eye. Correct me if I'm wrong, but aren't bottle rockets the hardest thing on the face of the planet to aim? Anyways, the next day they see the preacher...yes, I said the preacher...with an eye patch! Thus begins the inner conflict of the preacher. How can a man of the God be a creature of the night? Beats me. But now that the secret is out, Corey Haim and company now have a target. But the preacher knows they know.

(Spoiler Alert!) Now we all know you kill werewolfs with silver bullets, so they go to the metal worker to get one crafted. But that's the problem. When I said one, I meant one. They only have enough silver to make one bullet. (Least they could have done was sell something to buy some more silver. Sheesh!) Putting said bullet in a gun, they go home and wait for the monster to attack. One of the best scenes comes when the beast breaks in to attack. The gun gets hit out of Gary Busey's hands and the bullet falls out...and down into the heating vent! Luckily they have the craziest man on earth there to fist fight...yep...I said fist fight...the werewolf. And just as Busey gets flung to the floor and the monster is going to kill poor Corey Haim and his sister, Corey retrieves the bullet from the vent, loads it and shoots the beast...In The Other Eye! I mean, what are the chances of that? For a kid who has never shot a gun before in his life, you would think that he would at least aim for the biggest part of the body. But no. He feels the need to be a true marksman and shoots him in the eye. I guess those people who wrote the "Idiots Guide to Killing Werewolfs" forgot to put in the pages that werewolfs have weak and ultra vulnerable eyes as well. Here's the trailer for you to enjoy.

With Halloween coming up, do you have any scary old movies you love to watch?

Weekend Double Feature, Part 1

2008-10-24T22:27:00.000-07:00

Since I didn't post last weekend on a cheesy movie of the week, I'll post a double feature.

You ever have a film that has a song that just sticks in your mind. One that has stuck with me is an odd movie from 1968 called "The Green Slime". Sadly, the only thing that I could remember about the film was the cheesy and very funky song and that it involved some green ooze that changed into monsters. But I didn't have to look far to find a copy of the movie on youtube. Here's the skinny. Giant asteroid is going to crash into earth. Space troopers are sent to go investigate it and blow it to kingdom come. Only problem is that they go to the asteroid and there is this green slime. They think it's harmless. They're wrong. It turns into aliens. They fight the aliens. Lots of people and aliens die. In the end, they have to abandon the space station and nuke it to save the planet. Sounds pretty simple, right? Wrong. All the while, there is a love triangle swirling through the film between the space hottie and two men, the general and the grunt commando. And the best thing about the movie, they play that wonderful song again to close out the final scene. Here's the trailer for a taste of cheesy sci-fi that will stick with you for years to come.

And for those who haven't seen enough, here is the music video that was released with the film.

Porter's Picks Week 8

2008-10-23T11:31:00.000-07:00

Finally, for the first time this year, I was able to watch a little Premier action over at a friends house and let me tell you that there is nothing better than watching a good match with a fellow football fan (The REAL football!). Although I was only predicting correctly for 50% of the games last week, the results were satisfactory. With another win under their belts, Manchester United is continuing to climb the table. Here's to hoping Chelsea and Liverpool loose or draw a game in the future so that we can get to the top. Here are my picks for this week.

Saturday, October 25th, 2008

Everton vs Manchester United: With Man U coming off two massive wins, you can bet that they will continue their winning streak by beating Everton.
Sunderland vs Newcastle: With Newcastle getting a draw against a strong Manchester City team (2-2) this last week, I think this is the week Newcastle will pull out a win (even though I would much rather see Roy Keane's Black Cats take home the win).
WBA vs Hull City: After eight weeks, Hull City's sitting strong at the top in third place. Last week WBA lost 4-0 against Man U. Two words for the win...HULL CITY!
Blackburn vs Middlesbrough: With both teams having some troubles taking home the wins, I think Blackburn will pull out a small victory over Middlesbrough.

Sunday, October 26th, 2008

Chelsea vs Liverpool: This one is a scorcher! Both teams at the top. This is the 1 and 2 battle. Chelsea is coming off a 5-0 victory over Middlesbrough and Liverpool had a hard fought 3-2 comeback win over Wigan. This one is going to come down to heart, and after seeing the Pool fight for their win last week I have to say Liverpool will break the undefeated streak that Chelsea has had at home for the past 3 years. (But honestly, I'd love to see a draw so Man U can get a little closer to the two of them on the table.)
Manchester City vs Stoke City: Man City without a doubt will win this one.
Tottenham vs Bolton: Tottenham is having their worst start in years. I'm just surprised Juande Ramos hasn't gotten the boot yet. With two starters out with red cards, Bolton will take home the win.
Wigan vs Aston Villa: This will also be a great game. Look for the goal scoring maniac Zaki to put some more goals under his belt and help push Wigan to a home win.
West Ham United vs Arsenal: Arsenal looked a little rocky at the beginning of their game against Everton last Saturday, but once they got out the early game jitters, they looked unstoppable. Arsenal will take home an away win over West Ham.
Portsmouth vs Fulham: Portsmouth looks too strong for Fulham. And being at home, they'll more than likely win this one.

My Wife's Super!

2008-10-19T21:43:00.000-07:00

There are some days where I'm really glad I have someone who understands my crazy mind. The other day a friend invited us to a costume party for her husband (Happy B-day, Tyler!) and we came up with the idea of going as Lois Lane and Clark Kent. We talked about how we would dress and ended it at that. But the next day she comes home and says she has a surprise. What was the surprise? She reached in her purse and produced two fake press passes for the Daily Planet with the names Kent and Lane on them. Does she rock or does she rock? Here's a picture of us at the party with the super cool badges. (I know, I know. Superman doesn't have a beard...but he would if he lived in Oregon.)

The Jar-Jar Binks Disease

2008-10-17T21:47:00.000-07:00

Some classics should never be touched. They were great when they were first out and live strong in our hearts and minds...until someone comes along and screws things up! It's like my dad always said when he spoke to camp kids about going back to dig up/resurrect old habits. He would always say, "It's like going and digging up your old dead dog. Sure, he was a great dog back in the day, but do you really need to go dig him up and roll around and play with him again?" That's how I feel about old movies. Sometimes (and rarely) movies need to be redone because the effects back in the day couldn't portray the director's true vision. But most often, they should be left as they are.

Take for example the new Indiana Jones movie. Not a bad idea. Great visual moments. All in all, it was good fun, but... (Feel free to fill in the rest of the sentence yourself with whatever scene of the movie you thought was ridiculous.) For those of us who have read all of the novels, the idea of aliens wasn't so far fetched. But let's be honest. Some parts flat out stunk. After watching it for a second time, I think it all boils down to one problem. Lucas. Only the man who thought Jar Jar Binks was a good idea could kill something as good as Indiana Jones. After making the first new SW movie he must have contracted the Jar-Jar Binks disease and carried over into Indiana Jones. Sadly, it seems it even got to his good friend Steven because he didn't put the ax down on scenes that shouldn't have even been in the movie. If only there were some vaccine that could cure this giant disease we all call "suck", things possibly could have been better.

All it really comes down to is what they taught us all in grade school. When it comes to Star Wars 7-9 and Indiana Jones 5...JUST SAY NO! Here's a picture of what should have happened in the new Star Wars movies.

(See, I knew Elvis wasn't dead! He just time traveled to the future to become a Storm Trooper.)

Why Blog?

2008-10-17T12:41:00.000-07:00

Blogging is still a relatively new thing to me. I love the idea that I can put things on the web for all to see and enjoy. It actually really makes me miss having a band website to work on (sniff sniff). But since the majority of you that read this are bloggers, I wanted to toss out a question. I guess talking about lurkers got me thinking more about the art of blogging. The question is, what do you use your blog for?

Here's what I think.

Blogs are for sharing. Being a teacher we always jokingly say, "Sharing is caring," but honestly...I think it is. It's nice to share ideas and family pictures to others who may not see you on a regular basis.
Blogs are your own personal podium. Many people love to give opinions on particular things like movies, music, or sports. Since it's your own blog and you have total control, you can give your opinion and not have to ask any one's permission to post things to the Internet. Although I do miss the times I had to check with the old band to post things on our website, it's nice to have complete freedom to do whatever I want to do.
Last, blogs are a good way to make connections. You can connect to friends and family through posts and comments. You can also connect people to other blogs or websites by dropping links or pictures.

Now that you know my reasons, why do you blog and what do you use your blog for?

Attack of the Lurkers

2008-10-13T15:45:00.001-07:00

I love talking about how people use different modes of communication. For example, my generation loves to phone people to talk to, whereas the younger generations are content with instant messaging their friends to their hearts content. These thoughts lead me to thinking about blogging. Some use it to rant and rave. Others to show off pictures of their family and vacations. And people like me use it to talk about random things that they enjoy. But the one thing that I think I tend to forget is that blogs are a means of communicating and connecting to others. It wasn't until I started blogging on a regular basis that I began to wonder, "Is anyone else enjoying this besides me?"

Then I learned about the blog no no of lurking. (Thanks Tyler!) Lurking is the act of reading and perusing other people's blogs but never leaving comments. Be honest with yourself, your probably lurking as you read this blog right now. I do it all the time. Lurking is especially easy to do when you don't know who the blogger is. I love to press the next blog button at the top of the screen just to see what other around the world are blogging about. But the more I think about it, the more I am intrigued to think of what would happen if I posted comments to all the blogs posts I read. Would people feel more connected? Would it raise the bloggers self esteem knowing that others are reading? Would new friendships be made over the Internet by commenting on a blog written by someone you don't know? All that I know is that I'm interested to find out. So for the next month I have challenged myself to comment and not lurk. I'd also love to challenge those other bloggers out there to do the same. I can't wait to see what will happen.

What are your thoughts on "lurkers" and commenting? Interested to take the challenge?

I Thought You'd Be Bigger

2008-10-12T09:21:00.000-07:00

Ever heard someone say something like this? It's like that restaurant that all of your friends say is the "best place on the face of the planet!" The only problem is, you've never seen the place. And then you get there only to find a run down, tiny little hole in the wall and you say to yourself, "I thought it would look nicer." This is how it is for the main character of our 1989 Sunday Matinee, "Road House."

But before I get ahead of myself, I have to discuss one thing. Like all of the old matinees of the past, movies sometimes need a little tweaking and editing in order to show them on TV. Since this movie is full of cursing and inappropriate content, some elements will be changed in order to keep it at a PG rating. But for the fun of it, I'll take the first letters of those words and use them to create new sayings. Enjoy!

Patrick Swayze plays Dalton, a short yet super tough guy who is know all around for being the best cooler in the business. He takes places where they "sweep up the eyeballs after closing" and helps turn them into classy joints. And what place is he trying to clean up? The Double Deuce. First on the list of things to do is clean up the staff. Some might think that this is a good thing, but boy are they wrong. Swayze fires the nephew of Brad Wesley, the town's one true thug who has control over almost everything and everyone in the area. Uh oh! He then proceeds to train the ones who stay to help make the Double Deuce a respectable place to party. And all he says is, "I want you to be nice." One fellow replies, "What if they call you a Cuddly Sasquatch?" Swayze's response to that is, "Well are you?" A couple of bar brawls later, the place is getting better. Business is up. People are flocking to the joint. Swayze gets cut by a knife and has to go to the doctor. But this doctor is not just a doctor, she's a hot lady, who eventually falls for Dalton's tough guy antics. She even asks if he wants anything for the pain before she staples him up. He gives her the best three words he can say to keep up his tough guy persona. "Pain don't hurt." They begin to date. He finds out she used to date Brad Wesley, who isn't over her yet. This just adds fuel to the fire. But this is where the movie really gets good. Wesley brings in the muscle...a mullet wearing dude who like to say things like, "I used to Flabbergast guys like you in prison!" So Swayze calls up his mentor Wade Garrett, who is none other than the long haired, limping, motorbike riding Sam Elliot. They all fight. A bunch of times. Enter the drama. Wade Garrett knows Swayze's one secret. He killed a man. Gasp! He even tries to perk up Swayze by telling him, "You can do two things when a man points a gun in your face. Lay down and die, or kill the Mellow Fellow!" Things get worse. Brad Wesley begins torturing people in the town. He even kills Wade Garrett! Swayze then fights Wesley's kung-fu boy, tears out his larynx, and then pushes him into the river yelling, "Hey Wesley! Fluffy Yaks!" In the end, it all comes down to a showdown between Swayze and the bad guy.

Honestly, what more can you ask for in an action movie? You've got fighting, great one-liners, girls, 80's blues music, and my wife's favorite...Patrick Swayze's Butt! This movie so good that people have even written songs about it. So attached below, for your viewing pleasure, is the Mystery Science 3000 song, "Let's have a Patrick Swayze Christmas."

Becoming a True Oregonian

2008-10-10T16:53:00.000-07:00

Although some people still refer to me as the guy from California, I think that having been here for over a year has made me grow a little bit more into the Oregonian that I am today. People were shocked the other day when I said I was actually happy that it was raining. With all of the fall colors starting to show (as you can tell from the picture taken from out patio), this place is unbelievably beautiful. I also love wearing sweaters and layering clothes, which you get to do for practically the entire year. And scarfs! Awesome! Lastly, I now fit in a little more because I have a beard. I mean, you gotta keep your face warm when it gets nippy out, right?

Porter's Picks: Week 7

2008-10-09T21:38:00.000-07:00

Even though I came in at a 50% prediction rate, I still think the games should have panned out as I thought they should have. WBA actually won. Middlesbrough upset Wigan. And Villa did not upset Chelsea. Oh well, that's why there is another week, right?

Barclays Premier League News:

Fernando Torres thinks his goal scoring drought is over. After scoring two goals in his match last week, he thinks his hot streak has begun. But will it be like this years last Euro Cup? Hot one second, ice cold the next.
Newcastle ends it's loosing streak by playing a 2-to-2 draw against Everton. Could they now be on the up and up?
Lots of Manchester United news this week. Rumors say that Ryan Giggs will be tapped for a coaching job once he retires from play. It wouldn't be a surprise considering he's been with the club for 18 years. It would only be natural for him to join the coaching staff, along side his past teammate Ole Gunnar Solskjaer. Rooney admitted that his game hasn't been up to par and says he'll do better (and did by scoring in last weeks match). And lastly, there is a chance that Rio Ferdinand will captain the English squad if John Terry can't make the match. All in all, a good week for Man U with a 2-0 win.
Finally, Chelsea stays on top despite infuries to their front line. Could this be a year for the blue? We'll see.

Weekly Predictions for Week 7:

Saturday, October 11th, 2008

Middlesbrough vs Chelsea: I'm calling a huge upset. Middlesbrough is at home and upset Wigan in an away game last week at the JJB. I say they'll pull this one off. This will be a true test for Chelsea.
Arsenal vs Everton: Arsenal at home...no doubt!
Aston Villa vs Portsmouth: This is the game of the day. Villa loves winning at home and Portsmouth, despite their great beginning, are having problems winning away games so far this year. I call Villa to win.
Bolton vs Backburn: It's just a matter of time until Roque Santa Cruz starts banging in goals. I predict it will start happening this week. Blackburn will win, but this may turn out to be a draw if both teams strikers can't find the back of the net.
Liverpool vs Wigan: Wigan was upset by Middlesbrough last week. Now they have to play against Liverpool at home. Steve Bruce better give a major pep talk to his team because if he doesn't, this one may get ugly. Torres looks to be starting a hot streak so look for The Pool to show the fans at home how to get the big W.
Manchester United vs WBA: Man U is just getting warmed up. And since I bleed red, I'll never say Man U will loose. WBA is going down!

Sunday, October 12th, 2008

Hull City vs West Ham United: After week 6, Hull City is in 3rd place! Can you believe it? They weren't even in the Premier league last year. This is a spectacular run and I can only see it continuing. If they can beat Arsenal, they can beat anyone...except for Manchester United, of course.
Stoke City vs Tottenham: This is the battle for the bottom. Both teams are looking terrible. But Gareth Bale says he is sure his team can do better. And who better to believe than a fellow Whelshman? I say Tottenham starts to make their way up with a win over Stoke City.

Monday, October 13th, 2008

Newcastle vs Manchester City: I really want to root for Newcastle to make it's way out of the bottom and make it's way back to being a heavy hitter in the Premier league, but I just don't see them beating Manchester City. Man City will be looking to get back into top form after loosing to Liverpool last week. And having shown us all that they can score goals (like their 6-0 win three weeks ago), they'll pull this one out even though they'll be in Newcastle.

Agree? Dissagree? Feel free to comment on what you think.

Little Eyes Version 1.0

2008-10-07T21:27:00.000-07:00

As a music snob, I hate hearing something when it's only half done. But when you work with talented people and go into the studio and come out with a version of a song that is pretty darn close to being finished, you just have to share it with everyone you know. Last Friday, I recorded a quality version of "Little Eyes"at Travis's house. Not only is he very talented at sound engineering, he also plays a mean keyboard. I showed him the demo of the song and he automatically told me that he wanted to lay down some tracks. Two hours later, we had this. It still has some final cleaning up to be done but I think it sounds great. To hear the almost finished cut of the song, just go to drop.io/portermusic and give it a listen.

What do you think?

Money Crisis and Oregon Beer

2008-10-06T16:18:00.000-07:00

Since I now live in one of the largest microbrew areas in the US, I thought this was very fitting to post. Oregonians know how to make beer and know how to drink it. So I thought this way of thinking was quite an interesting way to look at finances and the state that our economy is in. (Thanks to Julia for sending this to me.)

If you had purchased $1,000.00 of Delta Air Lines stock one year ago you would have $49.00 left. With Enron, you would have had $16.50 left of the original $1,000.00. With WorldCom, you would have had less than $5.00 left.

But, if you had purchased $1,000.00 worth of beer one year ago, drank all of the beer, then turned in the cans for the aluminum recycling, the REFUND you would have gotten would have been $214.00 cash. Based on the above, the best current investment advice is to drink beer and recycle. It's called the 401-Keg

A recent study found the average American walks about 900 miles a year. Another study found Americans drink, on the average, 22 gallons of beer a year. That means, on average, Americans get about 41 miles to the gallon.

Makes You Proud To Be An American!

Saturday, Saturday, Saturday

2008-10-04T14:04:00.000-07:00

For me, Saturday is the major day of relaxation. Since things can get a little busy on Sundays (especially when I'm on worship team at church), this is the only day I can keep free from over scheduling in my week. Even when I was younger, it was the day that I liked to relax and subject myself to meaningless media and film. I can distinctly remember going over to my grandma Porter's house and watching cheese ball movies on Fox on her black and white, 10 inch TV in the back room. Although the picture wasn't the best, it introduced me to Kung Fu theater, Monster Movie of the Week, and many other rediculously over-acted and action-packed movies.

So why blog about this? I thought it would be fun to take a walk down memory lane and post every Saturday about the best of the best (or the worst of the worst depending on who you talk to) of the action movies. And what better way to do that than by posting about my favorite scenes/movies in the genre. Now there is really no way to widdle them all down to a best of list or rank them. Each of these cinematic gems is special in it's own right and ALL of these are my favorites! So in keeping with the theme of the best, today's special showcase is the 1989 classic, "Best of the Best."

Here's the gist. The US and Korea have agreed to bring thier best karate champs together to duke it out in a tournament. Each country brings five guys. They fight in the end of the film. Sound good? Just wait. It gets better. The coach is none other than James Earl Jones, who spouts words of wisdom through the entire film, like "A team is not a team if you don't give a damn about eachother!" And the team consists of two no name actors, karate expert Phillip Rhee, Chris Penn (who plays a total red-neck cowboy karate dude), and...wait for it...Eric Roberts, who (in the movie) hails from none other than Portland, Oregon! I mean, how much better can this get? Then comes the conflict. One of the characters has to face the man who killed his brother in a tournament just like this. Oh, the tradjedy! Finally, after a ball busting bar brawl (say that five times fast) and an excellent 80's training montage, the two teams square off. Who wins? I can't tell you, but I can say that if you're not standing in front of your TV, chearing U S A at the top of your lungs, there may be something wrong with you.

Here for your viewing pleasure is the trailer, complete with action, drama, 80's music, and Eric Robert's crying. Enjoy.

Porter's Picks

2008-10-02T11:30:00.000-07:00

Last week, for the first time, my buddy Sean and I were discussing the upcoming weekend games of the Premier League and told each other our predictions for the upcoming games. Not only was it a ton of fun, but we also got to vent about teams, players and outcomes of the past weekends games. So I thought to myself, "Why not do this every week?" So I'm doing it. For those of you that appreciate the game for what it is... The Best and Most Popular Sport in the World, this is for you. And for those of you that don't care, deal with it.

Barclays Premier League News

Roy "The Skipper" Keane's coaching contract is up soon. Will Sunderland put on offer on the table? I think so. He's worked wonders for the team and has helped the Black Cats stay in top shape.
Can Chelsea continue to win with so many players on the roster at injured status? Joe Cole, Deco, Carvalho are out for a while. Drogba's health is questionable. And Kalou, who was injured, is finally returning to play. Who's next? Anelka? If so many injuries continue, Chelsea could find themselves sliding down the table quickly. Good thing they have a solid bench.
Mark Hughes' move from Blackburn to Manchester City was a positive thing. Even though they lost to Wigan last week, with a young squad and Robinho in the front they have already started shaking things up in the top half of the table.
Hull City, after moving up to the big leagues, has shown other teams that they can hang with the big boys. After a huge win over Arsenal last week, they look to be making a name for themselves. Question is, how long can they keep this up?
Champions League Round Up - Man U defeated Aalborg 3-1, Arsenal rocked Porto 4-0, Liverpool beat PSV Eindhoven 3-1, and Chelsea was held to a draw against CFR Cluj 0-0>

Weekly Predictions for Week 6:

Saturday, October 4th, 2008

Sunderland vs Arsenal: Arsenal should win this one. But if they have tired legs from playing in the Champions league this week, Sunderland may be able to pull off a win.
WBA vs Fulham: WBA to win. Fulham haven't been looking that impressive lately.
Wigan vs Middlesbrough: With Zaki keeping up his hot streak of scoring five goals in the past five games, I predict Wigan to squeak out a win.
Blackburn vs Man U: This is the must-see game of the day. Although Manchester will be dealing with Paul Scholes being out injured (10 weeks for a knee injury), they should be able to win. Berbatov looked great and scored two in the Champions league game, so look to him to put the ball in the back of the net.

Sunday, October 5th, 2008

Westham vs Bolton: Westham to win. They have been playing top notch ball lately.
Chelsea Vs Aston Villa: This is one of two exciting games to watch on Sunday. Villa can pull this one off for the win. With so many injuries, Chelsea's bench is going to be stretched. I predict Villa to win by one.
Man City vs Liverpool: This one's gonna be great. This is the other game to watch. Liverpool has shown that they can be beat. Needless to say, this ones going to be close. Although they lost last week to Wigan, I think Man City will come back this week with a fire and win.
Portsmouth vs Stoke City: Stoke City hasn't looked that great yet. Portsmouth will definitely take this one.
Tottenham vs Hull City: Can anyone stop Hull City? That's what everyone wants to know. I don't see Tottenham winning this one. Hull City will continue their hot streak.
Everton vs Newcastle: With so many issues in the coaching department, it's no wonder that Newcastle looks terrible. Everton will bring home the W for this one.

Have any thoughts or disagreements? Feel free to comment and sound off about your predictions for week 6.

SV Baby #2 Joins the Band

2008-10-01T22:19:00.000-07:00

We always joked around that all of us in the band would have children and that those children would get together and make a band. Art was the first one to fill his shoes as the first SV father, but now he has someone to keep him company. JT and Ashley Hughes just delivered SV baby number 2. Today at 1:17 PM, Ashley gave birth to Quinn Ramsay Hughes, a 9lb. 13 oz. and 22 inch baby boy. Congrats! We are all so happy that the delivery was smooth and that Ramsey and mom are doing well! The only question I have is whether or not JT has put drum sticks in the kids hands yet? :)

4th Grade Writing of the Day

2008-09-29T20:12:00.000-07:00

I just finished correcting all of the first writing prompts of the year and I thought to myself that it wouldn't be fair to just share 4th grade sayings of the day. Sometimes you come across a typo or mistake that is so funny you just have to share with someone. Enjoy!

While writing about a cat, one student writes..."Don’t let her jump on you or else she will bitch you on the cheek." I think I know what a bite would look like, but I'm dying to see a bitch to someone's cheek.

Another student is writing about her hamster. She writes, "Hamsters can sometimes be gross because when you put them in a ball that rolls, they will start pooping where they want and when they want." I never knew hamsters had the sheer willpower to control their bowel movements. I thought they just went. Oh well. You learn something new every day, right?

The Best Parenting Guide Ever!

2008-09-29T19:45:00.000-07:00

My friend Phil sent me a gift today that answers any questions I will have about taking care of future baby Porter. It's called Safe Baby Handling Tips by David and Kelly Sopp. It's a picture book that gives you advice with simple pictures of the do's and don'ts of child care. It even comes with a the handy dandy WHEEL OF RESPONSIBILITY. The wheel not only "keeps parents fair, honest and undivorced," but also makes it so arents can simply spin the wheel to see who's duty it is to clean the doodies. So that you can enjoy this book as much as I have today, here are a few pictures of my favorite do's and don'ts.